An Arizona Cheesehead's Thoughts

A Thought From Flying The Friendly Skies

2012-01-30T16:36:00.002-07:00

Here are reasons why I think people become flight attendants: the chance to travel on someone else’s dime or cheaply on your own, opportunity to meet a lot of people and an interesting schedule.

Here’s a reason that I don’t think factors in to that career decision: having to shill duty-free products.

Every time I fly to and from Calgary, they make the attendants go down the aisle with a cart hawking cigs, booze, jewelry and perfume. Just like the vendors on the beach in Mexico only the attendants have wireless credit card machines. I suspect the Mexican vendors will some day, too.

I suspect it’s not what the attendants signed up for but the airlines are trying anything to make a buck. They should run a Kino game. There’s a revenue generator for sure and it would keep the passengers entertained.

Any airline who takes up that idea owes me a cut.

Another Small World Story

2012-01-29T17:52:00.000-07:00

Some friends of mine and I have decided to try out some different cultural events this year. We've already been to the Pulaski club a few times and last night was our visit to the Croatian-American Club which is in a sketchy west Phoenix neighborhood. They were having a dinner and music party.

As were getting settled in, a guy from the table next to us said to me, "What's your name?" I said, "Kathy." He then asked, "Kathy Pfister?" I froze like the proverbial deer.

See, this is the reason I have to always behave myself in public. I never know when someone's going to recognize me then report on my improper behavior. Before you think I'm self aggrandizing here, what are the odds someone's going to know me at the fracking Croatian-American Club? (Besides the Croatians that I already know.)

He asked me if I looked familiar and he did but then when I saw him with his wife, I connected all of the dots. Mac and Diane were people that worked at Motorola with my parents (and me for a summer when I was an intern) back in the day. Her dad is the reason they come to the events. Diane's sister was also there and she knows my parents, too.

Everyone knows my Dad. I'm pretty sure that's where I get all of the social butterfly skills from.

We had a nice time catching up. Mac reminded me that he was the bartender at my college graduation party. A job that he did all too well because my then boyfriend slept on our couch, posed like a corpse with his arms crossed, and never moved until I woke him up the next morning. I told Diane to friend me on Facebook but I warned her to expect a lot of postings about my cat.

I can't wait to see whom I run into at the next cultural exchange. Because, I'm sure someone will know me.

Book Review - Lunatics

2012-01-29T17:36:00.001-07:00

Lunatics: A Novel by Dave Barry
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Damn, I wish I were creative enough to pull out a story that's as funny and outrageous as this one. A series of increasingly implausible events lead to the hysterical adventures of two guys from New Jersey. Rude and crude Jeffrey Peckerman and peaceful and kind Philip Horkman find themselves on the run after the authorities believe they tried to blow up the George Washington Bridge. That incident came about because of a lemur and a diabetic's insulin pump and it just got more outrageous from there.

Told in alternating chapters from the point of view of each man, the story has lots of potty humor, violence and general mayhem. It's also a brilliant satire on the politics of the world.

I laughed a lot.

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Farewell, Chuck

2012-01-28T14:44:00.000-07:00

I just finished watching the two hour series finale of Chuck that aired last night. Watched it with tears rolling down my cheeks at the sweetness, the memories, the fondness for Chuck and Sarah's love story and because I'm going to miss this show. A lot.

Credit: Warner Brothers

It wasn't always a smooth ride. The show had some weak moments and too often was on the edge of being canceled. Ultimately, enough fans, and Subway, came through for support and we got five years.

There were some great moments and the "where are they all going" closure scenes and photo montage at the end showed how far the show and characters have changed. Zachary Levi is a handsome dude. I'd forgotten just how nerdy he was at the beginning. So was Joshua Gomez. Man, those dudes needed serious hair cuts.

I loved the open ended finish to the series. All might not be right in Chuck and Sarah's world but I still feel those two crazy kids will come out OK.

This is one series that I'd love to watch from beginning to end again.

Book Review - Miracle Cure

2012-01-28T12:17:00.001-07:00

Miracle Cure by Harlan Coben
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I love Coben. This a re-release of a book he published in 1991.

Michael Silverman is a player for the Knicks. His wife, Sarah Lowell, is a television journalist. Michael becomes ill and the diagnosis is AIDS. (Remember, this is 1991 and it was still thought to be a "gay" disease.) Michael starts treatment at a secret clinic where AIDS patients appear to be cured only to be brutally murdered by a serial killer.

Lots of twists and turns and some good characters. I would love to see another book featuring Max "Twitch" Bernstein, the NYC cop who solves the case.

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Oh, Really?

2012-01-27T16:01:00.001-07:00

One of my co-workers, Kyle, is selling squares for the Super Bowl so we're getting a higher than usual amount of traffic in our area.

A guy came up the backstairs today and started talking to Kyle. We're all in cubes so everything can be heard even when you're not trying and the guy said something that made me think he was in our fantasy football league. I peaked over the cube and I don't think I've ever seen him before even though I've worked there for 13 years and he's worked there for years, left and came back.

It was, indeed, the guy who won our work fantasy football league this year. I sat up in my chair and entered the conversation and I don't think he knew me from Adam, either. Maybe, I should say Eve since I'm a chick.

We were talking about how happy we were to beat certain teams in our league and he asked, "Kathy, did you really run your team because I heard your husband was actually doing it?"

My response was, "First, I don't have a husband and, second, I know more about football than those jackasses." Those jackasses being the team that I beat in the playoffs for third place.

It seems like it was only one of the jackasses, though, that was spreading the lie. I emailed them both with this message, "So, I heard today that I had help running my fantasy football team. Funny, I don't remember anyone looking over my shoulder."

I haven't heard back from the rumor starter but his buddy responded with, "I am thinking that I was added strictly for the entertainment value of what is about to take place."

It should probably irritate my feminist side that my skills aren't being acknowledged and that I clearly had to have male help because what could a woman possibly know about football? However, I just find it laughable.

If someone's bugged by being beaten by a girl, then I'm just glad I'm the girl who did it.

Taking My Body For Granted

2012-01-27T12:19:00.001-07:00

Knock on wood, I've had very few physical issues in my life. The last year or so were not so good but before that the worse that ever happened is that I would hurt my back and suffer for a week or two. Oh, and there was that one bout with sciatica. That was not fun. But, I've been lucky.

I have once again tweaked my back and it's killing me right now. I don't blame it. I know I should have been stretching on a consistent basis and should stop making it carry around so much excess weight but I don't pay any attention to all that until it's broken in some form.

Ibuprofen has been my friend and I'm not missing a dose as it wears off like clockwork. I'm trying to avoid bending and twisting but that's quite the trick when you're trying to get in and out of a car. I look like an old lady. And old, decrepit lady.

The only bonus about getting into the car is that once I'm in, I can crank up my heated seat. That feels so good that I don't want to get out again.

I wonder if anyone would care if I took my laptop out to the parking lot and worked from my front seat?

A friend has given me the name of a chiropractor and another has offered up some of her massage package. If it doesn't get better, I may try both of those option. My doctor will be no help. He's just not a pill pusher, damn him, so I'll get the "lose weight, take Tylenol, exercise" lecture. What I would really love is for him to say, "Here's some Soma." That's good shit right there.

Oh, well, it will get better. And, I won't stretch or exercise or lose weight and it will get tweaked again. Definition of insanity...that is I.

Banned for Inappropriate Content

2012-01-26T16:56:00.000-07:00

We went to the Yardhouse for dinner before the hockey game on Tuesday. Tim and I ordered half yards of tasty brewed beverages. He got a Moose Drool and I ordered the Black and Tan made with Guinness and their Pale Ale.

Yummy

Chuck started in on the glass. First by saying it's too awkward to drink from then by saying it looked like something from a medieval doctor's collection with the implication that it should have body fluids/parts stored in it.

Dude, that's not making my beer very appealing.

Somehow, this led him to the subject of a Civil War medical kit that he saw on an antique show. He was apparently amazed by the catheters because he went on and on and on about them. About their weird shape, how you would insert them (which he acted out) and how they got progressively bigger but you wouldn't care how big they were if you were going to die because you couldn't urinate.

Based on his description, I think this is what they looked like:

Ouch

This was not an appropriate topic of conversation at any time but it was especially unseemly at the dinner table. I told him he was banned from dinner with us again but I suspect he either didn't hear me or didn't care because I got no reaction to that statement.

That was all bad enough but, after the game, he got on to the subject about how some woman swallowed her wedding ring that led to further discussion on retrieving items after they've gone through a digestive track. I have no idea what triggered all of that but, again, not a proper subject for discussion. At least we weren't eating anymore.

He's so not going with us again unless he agrees to be mute for the entire evening.

The People Watching May Have Been Better Than The Game

2012-01-25T16:55:00.000-07:00

Two of my work buds, Steven and I went to the Coyotes-Senators hockey game last night. Tim found the tickets on Stubhub and they rocked! 9th row, just off the penalty boxes. We paid $44 each with fees and the list price was $120.

On a side note, I think our hockey ticket prices are high but Tim told me they're twice as much in Calgary for the Flames. He said the good seats at the Saddle Dome are $240. That's a lot of money for just one game.

We were settled in to our seats when three women and one man came and sat in front of us. It was all too soon before we noticed that at least one of the women was drenched in perfume. Seriously, I found myself leaning back just to have to smell it less and noticed the guys doing the same.

We narrowed it down to the actual culprit. Let's just say she didn't appear to be your average hockey game attendee, in my opinion. First, she had on this feathered headband with a big fake gem on it. It sort of looked like the picture below without the pointy things sticking out of it.

This look just screams hockey, right?

Second, she had a huge tramp stamp which we saw a lot of because her shirt was too short and she was up and down the whole night. Then there were her "claws" as they were described. Long, fake nails with a gold and black pattern painted on them.

She wouldn't have stood out at the Bird's Nest for the Phoenix Open (or whatever it's called these days) but she sure stood out at the arena.

The final thing(s) that made me think she wasn't really a fan were that she spent most of her time tapping on her smart phone (with broken glass on it, classy) and listening to our conversations and responding to them to her friends. For example, Tim and I talked about the PBRs we got and she said to her friends, "We really need to go the PBR this year." I had to explain to Steven that was Pro Bull Riding. We learned a bit about her, as well, as her conversations weren't all that quiet.

I have to admit she kept us entertained. The game ended with a 3-2 victory by the Coyotes but they played rather sloppily so it was sometimes more interesting to see what she was doing than watching the guys on the ice.

If only one of her friends had the nerve to tell her that her perfume was too much. I would tell my friend. Seriously, that stench could have triggered an asthma attack.

Thanks, Anonymous!

2012-01-25T15:12:00.001-07:00

I came into work today and noticed my chair had been pulled out from my desk. Curious. Then, I saw that someone had left me some gifts. Sweet! (Literally.)

Yum, chocolate

The cow pie is from Baraboo, WI. I imagine the logo bar is from Wisconsin as well.

Apparently, there's a Cheesehead Elf somewhere in the building who wants to give me presents. I'm good with that.

Dammit, George!

2012-01-25T13:53:00.000-07:00

Brand new...

These containers of shampoo and conditioner sat on the dining table for two days. Outside of the bag I brought them home in because George was constantly gnawing it. Yesterday, I moved them to the bathroom sink and this morning I found them like this.

Both containers have tooth marks on them and the conditioner one was actually punctured and spilling its contents out.

After ignoring them for two days, what was it about moving them to the bathroom that made George decide to chew them up?

I know, I know, there's no answer beyond that she's a demon.

Book Review - Mr. Monk on Patrol

2012-01-24T16:44:00.001-07:00

Mr. Monk on Patrol by Lee Goldberg
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Gosh, I really love these books and I'm sad that Goldberg will stop writing them soon.

Monk and Natalie head off to New Jersey to help out Randy who's not only the Sheriff in town but also the acting Mayor thanks to wholesale corruption in the city government. As it usually happens around Monk, someone gets killed, multiple crimes are solved and Monk continues to amaze with his talents.

It's nice to see Natalie and Monk progressing as characters and fun that Randy and Sharona were in the story. The book ends on a cliffhanger which makes me want to read the next one that much sooner.

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It's Like They Planned For Me To Come

2012-01-23T17:17:00.001-07:00

I did some clothes shopping yesterday. My favorite pair of jeans finally wore out. They went past the velvety soft worn stage to worn through. Bummer, because I loved the way they fit.

I managed to find two new pairs (and also got some layers for Calgary) but the best find was my new ring.

I love the baubles!

So pretty!

Those retailers know what they're doing. First, these rings are stretchy so they can fit a wide range of people. Second, they have them all jumbled up at the check out. Third, they're all big and bold which is what I've been buying lately. Since you have nothing else to do while they're ringing you up, of course you're going to browse. Well, you are if you're me.

I couldn't resist this piece. Not only is it cool looking, it will match several of my lia sophia items. As an added bonus, I already got a compliment on it today in the break room. Sweet!

On a side note, can someone tell me when my hands started looking like my Mother's? Sigh.

Preparing to Brrrr

2012-01-23T15:35:00.000-07:00

I’m heading back to Calgary again soon and am considering taking literally all of my clothes so I have enough layers. Well, I’ll leave my bathing suit home because I see no need for that.

One of the employees from our Calgary office was in Phoenix last week. She picked a good time to come as it was -40C last Monday. That’s the magic number where Fahrenheit meets Celsius. It was so cold that even the Canadians were shutting things down.

Can you imagine -40? I think the coldest I can remember is one Christmas Eve in Wisconsin when the high was -23 but I don’t think it got much lower than that. That was the last Christmas I spent (and will probably ever spend) in Wisconsin, by the way.

It’s warming up, though, and I hope the trend continues. I can take highs in the 30s (well, not without complaining). If it stays like that, I think I can get away with just the really heavy hoodie that my Mom got me for Christmas. My heavy jacket is just so damn bulky. Though, it makes for a damn fine pillow on the plane.

Oh, and I know I’m always saying that Canadians are so nice and polite but, apparently, they do have a mean streak. The chick who was down here told me she hopes they have just one bitterly cold day like that -40 when I’m there because they think it’s funny how much I hate the cold.

But, just one day. The joke’s not funny enough to ask for that kind of weather for any longer than that. Even for a mean spirited Canuck.

Seriously?

2012-01-22T17:10:00.002-07:00

Despite having literally dozens of toys, nothing inspires George to action more than plastic. Sandwich bag, grocery bag, shrink wrapping...it's all irresistible. If I want to store anything in a baggie, I have to lock it in the microwave or she'll chew right through the bag. I've lost count of home many bags I've given to people and said, "George wanted to put her mark on it".

I came home tonight with three bags from various stores and, within minutes, she had chew marks on all of them.

This Can't Be Healthy

I wonder what it's like to have a "normal" pet.

What Do These Say About Me?

2012-01-22T11:45:00.000-07:00

I got two unsolicited gifts this week from two different friends.

A drink bell and a tiara woozie (wine koozie)

I think these selections say I'm a spoiled, alcoholic Princess.

They also say I have some really nice friends.

Yet Another Cooking Show To Watch

2012-01-20T15:48:00.000-07:00

I'm now hooked on Rachael vs. Guy Celebrity Cook-off. I saw a few previews and wasn't interested until I found out who the celebrities were. Truthfully, only two of them were the enticement.

The contestants are Cheech Marin, Lou Diamond Phillips, Coolio, Joey Fatone, Taylor Dane, Summer Sanders, Aaron Carter and Alyssa Campanella. Some of them are not household names. I can't tell you the last time I heard a Taylor Dane song on the radio (and I think she went to Kenny Rogers' plastic surgeon), I wouldn't have recognized Olympic swimmer Sanders and I had no idea (nor a care) that Campanella is Miss America. The latter is way too skinny, by the way. The celebrities are playing for a $50,000 donation to the charity of their choice and they're very serious about the competition.

Cheech and LDP were who got me to watch. I love Cheech and LDP is a big foodie so I expected them to do well. Fatone is always good for a laugh, too, so he was an added bonus.

The first episode saw the contestants all making an item to serve 150 people who then rated each dish. The two people with the lowest ratings had to do a head to head cook-off with the loser going home. The second week the teams had to make desserts that were scored by pastry chef students. The third, and latest, week had three of the judges from my fave, Chopped, and the six remaining contestants went head to head to make each of the Chopped chefs' favorite foods. The three losers then had a cook-off with one going home after that.

So, now we're down to five contestants and I'm quite looking forward to the next show. As I said, the contestants are very serious and they follow the mentoring advice from Rachael and Guy to a tee. They aren't making fancy food which is a good call. These are food items that people can and do make in their homes all the time and you get to see some nice techniques that can be incorporated into your daily cooking. (For those that cook daily.)

You can watch the previous episodes via Cox On Demand or from the web.

One thing that I do have to admit that's ridiculous is that the female contestants are all decked out, including high heels. No real chef is going to run around a kitchen in three inch platform heels.

Must Learn ASAP

2012-01-18T20:28:00.000-07:00

This is the audio control on my bitching new car. VOL is obviously volume, MODE takes you through AM, FM and XM and the up and down arrows take you through the channels.

It became very obvious to me that I need to learn how to operate these all strictly by touch through a harrowing experience.

I was happily driving along and listening to an XM station when Stevie Nicks came on. This was followed by "Ack, Stevie Nicks, change the channel, change the station, change something, no, not volume! Ack, ack ack!"

I'm surprised I didn't crash the car.

Book Review - While I Was Gone

2012-01-17T22:21:00.002-07:00

While I Was Gone by Sue Miller
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

This was my book club selection for the month and we had some interesting views on it.

I loved the writing but I didn't love the main character, Jo. Jo's a middle-aged Veterinarian in a happy marriage with three daughters who are out of the house. When someone she knew from 30ish years ago reappears in her life, she relives those days and manages to make some terrible choices in the current day. I found her to be completely self-absorbed and perhaps some of that was because the book was told in the first person.

It was still a good read despite my lack of empathy for Jo.

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Overbooked...again

2012-01-17T22:15:00.001-07:00

I have 14 meetings on my work calendar on Monday through Thursday this week. I don't know why no one's booked up Friday yet but it's only a matter of time. Usually, I would just stay late to get my non-meeting shit done but I can't because I have something every night this week. And, this weekend. And, going into next week.

Here's the social schedule:
Monday - stop by the parents' to say good-bye to my Aunt who went back to Milwaukee today
Tuesday - host book club at my house
Wednesday - meeting an old bookseller friend
Thursday - getting my free beer from Eileen who won our Fantasy Football league
Friday - club happy hour
Saturday - party in Tucson
Sunday - lunch with chick poker gang
Monday - dinner with my friend Cheryl

The thing is, I wouldn't want to miss any of those events so I'm not complaining. I'm just anticipating being very tired.

I do have to admit that I am slightly bemused with myself that I continually schedule myself so that I have so little free time. I guess that's the price one pays for being a social butterfly.

I Keep Getting Dumber and Dumber

2012-01-16T16:36:00.003-07:00

I swear I’m not doing this boneheaded stuff just so I have blog fodder.

I went to make my new fave dish for dinner. Hot Italian sausage, chopped greens, onion and garlic with pasta. I put a pot of water on the back burner set to high to boil and my cast iron pan on the front burner set to medium-low to heat up so I could brown the sausage.

I cut a hole in the end of the sausage casing and squeezed out its contests into my pan. I had an instant, dramatic sounding sizzle and a boat load of smoke. By the time I got the pan off the stove, my smoke alarm was blaring. I put the stove fan on high and went to open the front and back doors. George was hiding behind her kitty condo at the front door and looked at me with terror in her eyes. I felt bad but was happy to know that something actually scares her.

The sausage was scorched in places so much so that I had to slice the burnt parts off. My pan was carbon coated so I had to scrub it before I could use it again. This time, though, I put some oil in the pan first though I usually get enough grease from the sausage to do my cooking.

I didn’t get any scorching but it still was really hot so I turned the burner down and had to keep stirring as I put the onions and garlic in. I took it off the burner altogether and thought to myself, “Why isn’t my water boiling after all this time?” It was barely warm.

That’s when it hit me. I had the burner controls backwards and had put the cast iron pan on high and the water pan on medium-low. Doh! No wonder I burned the meat.

This is where having a gas stove would have been very helpful.

Ultimately, the water boiled and my pasta cooked. The greens (I was using Kale this time) cooked down nicely with the sausage mixture and I tossed it all together. Still rather quickly since my pan was still damn hot.

It was all good and, eventually, the smoke cleared out of the house and the cat was back to being a demon but the cat’s Mommy needed two glasses of wine to calm down.

I Will Soon Be On Hoarders

2012-01-13T17:34:00.000-07:00

Sugar Daddy gave me a really great eight color printer for Christmas years ago. It prints out fantastic photos. It’s also fairly speedy on the regular black and white printing, too.

Because I have no other room for it, it sits on the part of my kitchen counter that’s open between the kitchen and dining room. (OK, I do have a second bedroom that would have room for it except that it’s filled with so much crap (like three vacuums) that I can barely get in there. You would think that George would use it as her hiding spot because there’s just that much stuff but she consistently goes to the far corner of my bed which makes it easy to find her and defeats the purpose of hiding. But, I digress.) Although it takes up space, it’s handy for printing because I can set my laptop on the counter and wire them up.

I went to print something out a while ago and the paper wouldn’t feed. Bummer. There’s a certain point with printers where it’s not worth repairing them and I suspected, since I’ve had it for years, this was that time.

At the same time, my Dad was bugging me for Christmas gift ideas. I put the two together and told him I would like a wireless, color printer with scanning and possibly faxing capabilities. He was excited to have an actual idea and got me what looks to be a really nice one.

Of course, because my printer was on a counter, it became part of the counter and a stacking place for bills, papers, cards, etc. Especially, since I wasn’t using it.

While I was on my cleaning binge this week, I sorted through everything that was sitting on the printer and that’s when I saw it. It being a big Sharpie pen that had fallen into the printer and was resting right where the paper fed.

I took the Sharpie out (and a paper clip that was also in there), fired up the printer, connected my computer and wouldn’t you know it? It prints just fine.

Sigh.

So, now I have a working eight color printer that just prints and has to be connected to my computer. And, I have a wireless color printer that will scan and fax. They both serve different purposes (really, you should see the photos that my old printer produces - way better than your basic four color printer) so I think I’m going to keep them both.

There’s not room on the counter for both, however, so I’m going to have to carve out a spot in the second bedroom for one of them. I’m thinking the old printer since I print fewer photographs than I do regular paper items.

Of course, that means I’m going to have to do some more cleaning. And, I think we know by now that no good can come of that.

Calling Dr. Freud

2012-01-12T15:22:00.002-07:00

I have no idea what inspired this or what it means but it was so strange that I feel compelled to tell the story. At least there was no cigar.

I had a dream in the wee hours of this morning. Well, it could have been as late as 5:30 but it was still dark out.

I was at a hotel where I often stayed on business (not in real life, just in the dream). For some reason, George was with me. As I was sitting on the commode and talking on my cell phone (something I don’t do in real life and greatly disapprove of) I could see across the room to a window to the outside.

Suddenly, a shape pushed its way through the curtains into the room. It was a rooster and looked suspiciously like my nemesis from Key West. The rooster ran across the room and jumped on my lap. I screamed and told the person I was talking to that I was attacked by a chicken. George hissed, made one swipe at the rooster then ran away while I yelled at her to come help me.

Without quite realizing how, I was up, and so were my pants, as I grabbed the rooster and took it to the door. When I opened the door, there were two people in the hallway that I was apparently familiar with so I tried to explain the rooster while tossing it out past them. As I was explaining, it ran back into my room. They made some comment about the same thing happening to them.

Then, I woke up. George was curled up next to me, fast asleep, and it took me a while to shake it off and go back to sleep myself.

Maybe the chicken that my parents fed me for dinner last night was wacky chicken, if you know what I mean. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.

Cleaning Tasks Me - Part Two

2012-01-12T11:43:00.003-07:00

This is the second message I received from the cleaning gods that leads me to believe I should just give up.

I tried to check my Yahoo account on my MacBook Pro and the page wouldn’t load. It said I didn’t have an internet connection. Here’s what I did to troubleshoot:
Turned the airport off and back on.
Closed and reopened the browser.
Flipped over to my virtual windows machine and tried it there.
Completely shut down and restarted the machine.
Unplugged my wireless router for a minute then plugged it back in.
Hit the reset button on my wireless router.
Fired up my Dell laptop to see if it connected.
Unplugged my cable modem for a minute then plugged it back in.
Plugged the Mac directly to the modem to see if the router was bad.

At this point, I assumed the problem was with Cox. How to look up Cox’s phone number since I don’t keep paper phone books became the next problem. I tried to load their page through the browser on my Droid. Their page is clearly not designed for mobile because it took forever to load. In the interim, I suspected they may ask me for my cable modem box number so I got back down on the floor and pulled it out of the entertainment center.

There was only one light on the modem and it was amber and written next to the light was the word Standby.

Huh.

Further examination of the modem showed a button on the side. I pressed it and, voila, I got a bunch of green lights instead of the one amber. And, I had internet again.

Motherbitches. I must have hit the button or pressed it up against the cabinet when I dusted. I can’t believe how much time I wasted troubleshooting a problem I caused in the first place.

But, wait, there’s actually more.

The next night, I switched on my BluRay to watch Netfix. It gave me an internet setup message. I figured all of my monkeying around had reset it so I went through the setup process for wireless. No go. I then went through the process for a wired connection. No go. Those were my only two options.

My next step was to call Steven since he’s the one who set it up to start with. He said he was pretty sure we went with a wired connection and suggested I see if it was still hooked up.

Good call as it was not. There was a disconnected cable sitting behind the router. Either my cleaning or my pulling everything out to reset it had disconnected it. I plugged it in and tried again with the wired setting.

Which failed. Motherbitches again!

It turns out that not all of the five places I have to plug in cables into the router are the same. I needed to plug it in to slot 1. Fortunately, that was my next try.

So, the moral of this story is that cleaning deprives you of the internet and TV which are two things I can’t (don’t) want to live without.

In summary, cleaning = bad.

Cleaning Tasks Me - Part One

2012-01-11T18:18:00.000-07:00

OK, I admit cleaning house is not my thing. I do the bare minimum to not look like one of those crazy hoarders people until I have someone coming over then I actually do “real” cleaning. But, the cleaning gods are trying to send me messages that it’s not worth it.

This was message one.

I have a dark rug in my living room. Dark rug plus cat with all white belly fur is not a good combination. Dark rug plus cat with all white belly fur plus cat who got and shredded green glitter balls for Christmas is an even worse combination.

I pulled out my vacuum cleaner and started in on the carpet. After a few sweeps across the floor, I noticed it was not getting any cleaner. In fact, there were big clumps of matter being deposited on the rug.

Nothing to do but tip the vacuum over and check the suction. Yeah, it was blowing air (and what was in it) out instead of in. I suspect a broken or slipped belt. I think I have a spare somewhere but no clue where it is.

So, I went to the vacuum that I thought I got from Crazy Grandma’s house but that I apparently stole from Sugar Daddy when I moved out from his place. That didn’t extract any dirt either. Upon further investigation, it too was blowing out. In this case, I think the culprit is that the bag is completely, probably overly, full. Do I have spare bags? Again, I think so but have no idea where.

On to vacuum number three. (Now is the time that any rational person would ask why someone who doesn’t clean has three vacuums. It’s because I never throw anything out. I got this one years and years ago but replaced it with better ones yet still moved it three times.) Fortunately, it’s bagless and its belt is functioning. It took several trips over the carpeted area but finally, the rugs were clean.

Well, as clean as they can ever be with countless cat and human hairs permanently attached to them. At least, there was no visible sea of white.

Of course, there’s a cat picture to go with this post. George has sooooo many toys lying around. Some of them move every once in a while but a bunch are just abandoned. I picked up the ones from the carpet and put them on the entertainment center. It didn’t take long...

Well, now I want to play with those!

It Might Be Cold Outside, But I'm Still Hot

2012-01-11T12:02:00.001-07:00

I absolutely love the seat warmers in my new car. We’ve had some cool mornings where it’s been in the 40s when I leave for work and the first thing I do is click that warmer on high. Toasty!

But, I find I’m using the feature when it’s even warmer outside. It as 63 last night when I left work and the car was cold to me so the seat warmer got turned on. When I went to pick up my lunch today, it was 58 and it went on again. I’m thinking I should just keep it on until summer.

My friends in the cold country will find my behavior absolutely ridiculous. If it gets anywhere near 60, they’re in tank tops, shorts and flip flops. I’m still in layered sweaters, jeans and closed toed shoes with socks.

Living in Arizona since I was nine years old has made me a weather wimp. Having seat warmers in my car is just going to make me even wimpier. But, I don’t care since for the first time in years I can legitimately claim that I have a hot ass.

Beware Of Visiting The Demon Lair

2012-01-10T17:42:00.001-07:00

Besides Chick Poker and Book Club, I don’t have a lot of people over to my house except for The Rocket Scientist and Steven. George is used to both of them. Used to, as in she growls at TRS as he walks up to the door and hides under the bed when Steven is inside.

Tracy and Julie came over to do some club business and I didn’t tell George they were coming. She was sitting on the dining room table overseeing my computer work when she heard someone walking to the front door. There was a leap to the kitty condo to investigate then a hasty retreat to the floor and the corner of the dining room table that is furthest from the door.

That’s where she decided to growl at Tracy. As soon as Tracy was in the house, George ran off to the bedroom. Oh, so not brave. I’m not even sure Tracy saw her.

Julie showed up and the three of us ate dinner and talked business. I saw George come creeping down the hall and pointed her out to Tracy and Julie. She slunk around for a while then actually approached Julie who was able to pet her.

Until George decided to nip at her. What a brat.

Eventually, she was comfortable enough to sit on her dining room chair. It’s the one that I’ll never be able to get the cat hair off of. Unfortunately, Tracy didn’t realize that everything under the dining room table is in George’s domain when she’s on her chair. Tracy reached down to scratch her own leg and got swatted at. Again, what a brat.

George ended up in her condo for the remainder of the evening where she alternated dozing and keeping an eye on our activities. I warned them not to get too close to the condo on their way out. That’s a guaranteed swipe of the claws.

What do I do? Beat her? I think she would slash me to death in my sleep if I did.

On the one hand, it was good to see her being social. On the other hand, I wish she weren’t such a demon when she is social.

Awesomesauce

2012-01-08T20:06:00.001-07:00

I always get apples in my organic deliveries. At least four, often six. If I followed the old adage of one a day consumption, I'd be set. But, for some reason I just don't think to eat them and they keep forever so I had a bunch built up in reserve.

Something triggered the thought to make applesauce out of them. While I won't think to eat a plain apple, I will definitely eat applesauce. I googled the interwebs for recipes, studied a few, then modified one and used it.

Here it is:

8 cups apples, peeled and chopped
1 cup brown sugar
1 heaping teaspoon cinnamon
1 teaspoon vanilla

8 cups of apples is a LOT of apples

I used my new Tupperware peeler and it did a great job. It didn't take me long at all to prep the apples.

It's also a lot of peels!

I put the apples, sugar and cinnamon on med-low heat and covered the pan. Total cooking time was about 35 minutes and I stirred every 5-10 minutes. The apples cooked down to about four cups and I probably should have diced them into smaller pieces because it was really chunky. I ran the mixer through them for a minute or so and it sauced some of pieces while still leaving some nice chunks.

The vanilla got added after that and it was time for a taste and to put the rest in the fridge.

Yummy

I must say that the still warm concoction was quite good. I had a cold serving tonight for dinner and that was good, too. If i make it again, I would add a little more cinnamon. It's definitely got that flavor but I would like it to be bolder.

Book Review - Fire

2012-01-06T14:12:00.001-07:00

Fire by Kristin Cashore
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This was described as a companion book to Graceling. You could read them in either order but I would suggest Graceling first.

Fire is a young monster. While she's human, she also possesses the power to enter and impact others' minds. Without trying, she also attracts extreme attention and devotion from anyone in her vicinity. Fire and her friend/lover Archer get involved in the intrigue and war between the rulers in the Dells, an area across the mountains from the Seven Kingdoms of Graceling.

Despite it being a feudal society, Cashore creates quite an egalitarian world. Women can be soldiers, command an army, stay single, have children but not get married or decide to never have children and non-marital sex isn't frowned upon and birth control is available (although the women have to take it).

I like these books and am putting the next one on my to-read list.

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Netflix Is Like The Boyfriend With One Last Chance

2012-01-03T16:30:00.001-07:00

I read in the business section yesterday that Netflix’s stock value has gone down 61% since last year. It’s not surprising considering their boneheaded move to split streaming and DVD services while greatly increasing the price. Sure, it wasn’t a gazillion dollar increase but it ticked people off and they left in droves. Their CEO (whom I can’t believe hasn’t been fired) has apologized and promised never to screw with the customers again. It’s a start but it didn’t stop people from bailing.

I shut down my DVD option but I’m still streaming. And, I love it. Especially in those weeks of the year (like the past two) where the networks aren’t showing new shows because of all of the holiday specials, sporting events and, well, the conflict of the holidays. Who has time to watch TV?

Well, I have time thanks to my DVR that makes TV viewing time so much shorter (although I am really out of the loop on trending commercials) and my Netflix.

It’s interesting to note how much of an Anglophile I am. So many of the shows in my Instant Queue are British or have British stars in them. Perhaps it’s because I’ve seen so much of the US product or, more likely, the British stuff is just more entertaining.

The first British series I started watching was Gavin and Stacey and I have a few more of those to go.

I just finished four episodes of Eleventh Hour starring Patrick Stewart as the British Science Officer. It took me half an episode to recognize that his cop sidekick was Christina from Ugly Betty.

I’m also starting the fifth season of Red Dwarf, a fairly cheesy but also touching space show that ran in the late 80s/early 90s.

And, I have some Stephen Fry good to go. I watched the first episode of Stephen Fry In America (I’ve read the book) and will likely plow through the rest this week. Also on tap, A Bit of Fry and (Hugh) Laurie. I adore Stephen Fry.

Some more items from across the pond in the queue: Robin Hood, Torchwood, Coupling, Being Human, Luther, Black Books and Spaced.

So, Netflix, I still love you. But, jack around with the pricing and options again and I’ll leave you in a heartbeat. A sad heartbeat, but I’ll leave nonetheless.

Book Review - Graceling

2012-01-02T15:33:00.001-07:00

Graceling by Kristin Cashore
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Really good story.

Katsa is a Graceling, someone who has a super skill and is identified by having two different colored eyes. The skill can be something minor like being able to hold your breath for a long time but Katsa's skill is killing. Her Uncle, one of the kings of the Seven Kingdoms, uses her to scare and punish those who defy him.

Working with others, Katsa forms the Council. A group determined to protect the people against the unjustness of their rulers and others, the Council helps free an old man from captivity. Looking for the old man is Po, a Prince from another Kingdom. He's soon in the Council and he and Katsa join forces to save a young girl.

Cashore has created an interesting, medieval world and populated it with real characters. I enjoyed the book quite a lot.

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Thoughts On A "New" Year

2011-12-31T13:16:00.003-07:00

As I was getting dressed today in my New Year's Eve garb (think lots of sparkly jewelry) I was pondering how we think of tomorrow as a brand new start. We use the day as an excuse to end the year eating and drinking and carousing and promise ourselves we'll behave differently come January 1.

January 1 is the day we'll start dieting and exercising. It's the day we say we'll stop using our credit cards. It's the day that we promise ourselves that we'll be kinder and gentler to others and ourselves.

It's almost like magic. One tick of the clock and we're all new! In reality, it's the day we say we're going to do all of those things but probably won't. At least not for long. Then, we kind of give up until the next year when we make the same resolutions again.

In fact, it's just another day. There's no magic inherently in it.

The magic is in us. We can make any day the beginning of a new year.

Maybe it's April 15 when you pay your tax bill that is the day you decide to make and keep to a budget.

Maybe it's the day when you have a physical with your doctor and decide to really, finally do something about your health.

It could be the day when you're unfortunate enough to lose a loved one that you decide to let bygones be bygones and mend old relationships.

It could be someone's wedding day when you decide to rededicate yourself to your own relationship or actively seek one out if you're alone.

So, if you find yourself failing to keep your New Year's resolutions (let's be honest, we all make them) keep in mind that any day is the beginning of a new year. It's all in how you look at it and when you truly commit.

Happy New Year to all of you tomorrow (and the day after and the day after that...)!

My Proper Crusade

2011-12-30T16:38:00.000-07:00

My aversion to the discussion and display of bodily functions is well known. Burping, farting, peeing and pooping are all things that should be done discreetly and never discussed. I don’t even like to say or hear the words. Ick.

The exception is when you warn people to stay out of the Goat Gas Zone but that’s it.

On my first trip to Calgary, I noticed that the public signs say Washroom instead of Bathroom or Restroom. (Don’t get me started on the horrid signs that say Toilet. That’s a picture you don’t want in your head.)

It’s not like you actually take a bath while you’re using public facilities. Nor, should you be resting. In, do your business, wash your hands then get out. That’s the ticket.

The key is washing so Washroom is perfectly named. Regardless of what you do in there, you should always wash afterwards.

I’ve gone on a personal crusade to get everyone to say Washroom. I figure if I start with my friends who are spread about the country, they can then influence their friends and so on and so on and our grassroots efforts will blossom.

I really hit up my peeps while we were in Florida. It only took a few times of them saying, “I’m going to the restroom” and for me to say “You mean washroom” before they started saying it themselves. Even if they started out with the wrong word then stumbled through the new and improved one.

I hope they’re keeping up with the new habit. I have and to the point where I asked someone in a dream last night where their washroom was. Seriously.

Just think, if we can get this to sweep the world, can world peace be far behind?

Kathy - Zero, Sauce - Two

2011-12-30T10:18:00.000-07:00

Here’s to hoping I’m less of a loser in 2012...

So, I improvised dinner last night. I had some organic sunburst squash to use and researched recipes online. One person had some recipes but said they pretty much hated the taste of the squash because it’s bitter. I decided what better way to hide that then by cooking it up with hot Italian sausage (my new fave food item).

I browned the sausage with some onions then tossed in the squash. It looked a little dry so I poured in about a third of a jar of organic Marinara sauce. It actually tasted pretty dang good.

The trouble started when I decided to eat in front of the TV. I was sitting in my chair with the plate on my lap when I tried to cut one of the squash pieces in half with my fork.

The piece of squash, several pieces of sausage and a lot of sauce went flinging off my plate and splattered all over my leg, my chair and the carpet. Godsdammit.

Yeah, I had flashbacks to the ruination of my favorite white tee-shirt when that batch of spaghetti sauce decided to jump out of its pan on the stove.
I did a quick cleanup of the chair and the floor, wiped the gobs off my jeans then threw the jeans in the washer along with the rest of the clothes in the hamper. It was laundry night anyway.

My dryer takes two runs to get things dry (it’s a stackable unit so not very powerful). I usually set the first round before I go to bed then set the second when I get up in the morning so I can take everything out when it’s still hot.

Of course, I forgot this morning so I was pretty much ready to go when I realized my clothes weren’t dry. I started up the dryer then dug through the load half way through to remove the smaller items that were already dry in order to speed up the bigger items. Finally everything was dry so I pulled it all out then threw on a pair of jeans and headed to work.

It was only after I got to work that I looked down to see that I was wearing the same jeans from last night and they are hugely stained with sauce. I look like I spilled an entire cup of coffee on myself. Which would be something since I don’t drink coffee.

Sigh.

Maybe my New Year’s resolutions should be to eat at the dining room table like a grownup and avoid red sauce.

Book Review - A Short History of Private Life

2011-12-29T16:32:00.001-07:00

At Home: A Short History of Private Life by Bill Bryson
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I picked this as our book club selection and chose poorly. It's not a book club book at all. (I've since picked a different one.)

What this book is, is a rather dense history lesson mostly centered in the 1800s. Bryson uses his home, a former parsonage built in England in 1851, as the way to tie in a ton of research. The book is a little over 400 pages long and the references are 20 pages long. That's an incredible amount of detail and research.

It was actually quite interesting and I learned a lot. I don't know how much I'll retain, though, because so much was covered.

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Fantasy Football - Champion Game

2011-12-27T08:59:00.001-07:00

To recap, I was playing for 3rd versus 4th in both of my leagues. Steven was last place in our club league but playing for the Championship in his other league.

It was a very stressful Christmas Eve. We were constantly checking our scores and, well, let's just say that I was coming out much better than Steven was. He finally removed himself to his room to watch and mope and we would periodically hear profanity coming down the hall.

It didn't help that he and his buddy had a side bet on their game. The loser had to pay the winner a dollar for the point difference in their scores. They capped it at $50 which was good because I think he may have lost by more than that.

My two games were much more competitive. The club game came down to a win for my by a score of 71-68. I swear we decided to pay out a pittance to third and fourth but apparently, not so. We're paying out first, second, last and high total season points. I must have missed all of that while I was playing bartender for the commissioner. Guess I won't be doing that next year.

The winner was my friend Eileen who just started playing with us this year. She's probably thinking we were a bunch of easy marks. It didn't hurt that she had Drew Brees. I hope she spends her $446.50 on something pretty for herself. Or, at least buys me a drink.

I came out ahead on the work league game, too. The final score was 153.04 - 139.36. I needed 2.03 points from Roddy White on Monday night and he took his sweet time getting it. Of course, by the end of the night he had 15.7 but I was sweating it. I also had the highest score of the week so I think I get some extra dough for that. My actual cash is unknown because our commissioner hasn't published the amounts yet despite my pestering.

Thank the football games for Cam Newton. He was the catalyst that turned my season around.

Of course, it being me, my players continued to rack up the injuries. Tony Romo - out in the first series. Man, that looked painful. Adrian Peterson, out for the season but not until he scored 11.2 points for me.

I feel sorry for every guy that I drafted and then ruined his season.

Pick 'Em was just pathetic. To go from winning last year to being in 6th place in both games is sad and shameful.

I love playing Fantasy Football despite the ups and downs. I completely relate to that commercial where they show people moping and crying. I didn't actually cry but I did mope. And swear. Come to think of it, there was probably more swearing than anything.

Wrapping Up The Holidays

2011-12-26T17:53:00.000-07:00

I just put away the wrapping paper, bows, tissue paper, gift tags and bags, boxes and ribbons from my Christmas present wrapping. Dang, I feel like there's more now then when I started. Probably because there was.

Damn Costco. One would think I would learn by now but one would be wrong. It's hard to get rid of habits that are years in the making.

Here's what started it all. Sugar Daddy and I would go to Costco early in December and buy industrial size packages of tissue paper, wrapping paper, bows and gift cards. Sometimes, we even agreed to split some of it up. Because, who really needs 500 sheets of tissue paper?

We ended up with beautifully wrapped gifts which was good. We also ended up with a lot of leftover wrapping material which was bad.

Bad, because we would go to Costco the next year and buy almost all the same stuff again. Were we smart enough to pull the leftovers out and evaluate them before going to Costco? Of course not. So, it turned into a "I think I need some more bows" or "I'm pretty sure I'm out of paper" and we would buy it all.

I did the same thing this year on my own. I actually knew I was good on paper, bows and tags but I thought I needed tissue and gift bags. No, I didn't. I have so much frakking tissue paper that I can wrap gifts for literally years. I did use some of the gift bags but I didn't need the 20 pack that I bought.

Somehow, I held off on buying more gift tags. I love their tags. I'm sure they're assembled by little Chinese children being paid $.10 a day and they're horrible for my carbon footprint but they're SOOOOOO cute! You get a mixed set of designs and I spent an inordinate amount of time trying to match the perfect tag to the gift.

For the record, I need nothing next year. Except gift tags, finally. Sweet!

Since I can't seem to blog without my cat in the post, here are some pictures of George helping me wrap.

I like the taste of this tape!

Since you keep pushing me off the table, I'll hide out in this box.

Or, maybe I'll try to suffocate myself in this bag.

And finally, the finished products underneath my parents' tree.

Happy Christmas!

Not Your "Normal" Holiday Person

2011-12-24T22:32:00.000-07:00

When it comes around to this time of the year, people often survey about favorite Christmas things. Well, Christians survey about your favorite Christmas things. Others will ask about your favorite holiday things but that's only because they're sensitive to the fact that not everyone is a Christian. Yes, that's a horse I will continue to beat.

I think my answers to the surveys put me in a small minority.

My favorite Christmas movie? Die Hard. Because nothing says the holidays like murder, mayhem and someone saying "Yippee ki-yay, motherfucka." I truly love that movie. Willis at his finest. Alan Rickman at his sleaziest and, oh, how I love him in everything he's ever done. The sequels will never match up to the original. I was once asked what movie I would take to a desert island (assuming it could be endlessly played) and that was my choice.

My favorite Christmas song? Baby, It's Cold Outside. In its time, it was about some sly seduction. Now, we can't hear it without thinking of some poor girl getting slipped a ruffie and completely violated. It has nothing to do with Christmas but it's always played this time of year and I love it more than I love Die Hard. Which is saying a lot. (It has to be the Dean Martin version, BTW.)

My favorite holiday food? Peppermint ice cream. Screw the turkey, ham, sweet potatoes, latkes, pickled herring or whatever you like. Peppermint ice cream is the bomb and they should sell it year round. I actually stock up and carry enough in my freezer to get me to the spring.

My favorite family activity? Well, this might match up to a lot of people's if they would admit it but it's watching football. No church, no gift giving, no singing carols. It's all about watching the NFL and rooting against Dallas (mostly because they're always on and, well, they're Dallas). We turn the volume down to pretend we're actually paying attention to each other but it's a facade. We really care about the games.

Despite my oddities, I really enjoy the holidays and spending time with my extended family. At the very least, I get good stories out of it all. At the very best, I get great memories that will carry me into the new year.

Phred's Phabulous Sweater

2011-12-24T11:56:00.000-07:00

I've told the story about our club mascot, Phred, being kidnapped while we were in Florida and kept in Iowa. While he was treated royally, we're glad his captivity is soon to be over. Thom headed back to visit his family in Iowa for the holidays and made a trip to Ankeny to retrieve Phred.

Oh, and to go to Dawnie's fab Festivus party, too.

It's pretty traditional (if Festivus can count as a tradition). Airing of the grievances, feats of strength and an ugly sweater contest are all standard. I suspect a lot of alcohol is consumed as well.

Since Phred has a pretty cushy life and has no actual muscles or bones to help in the strength department, his only chance to participate was in the sweater category. He actually has several outfits already but none are ugly.

Until I stepped in and decided to make him a sweater. I used an old vest as a model and headed off to Michael's to buy supplies. I let the materials that I found design the final product.

Sweater Supplies

Of course, I had help.

Let me inspect your work

George was into everything. I would walk away while the glue was drying and turn to find her on the table in the middle of it all. That wouldn't have been so bad but then she started stealing things.

I have no idea how this pom-pom got on the floor.

I finally had to put all of the supplies in a box with a lid between steps. I'm surprised she didn't burn herself, or anything else, with the glue gun because she was all over everything so many times.

I'm not sure I approve of your color selection

Despite her help, I finished the sweater. I think it was a valid entry into the contest.

The pom-poms make the front.

It isn't the holidays without some Rudolph.

The sweater was FedEx'd to Iowa and Phred was ready for the party. I couldn't wait to see him in it so I asked Dawnie to send me pictures. Pictures, I got, too.

Phred and Jim's Stand In

Our friend, Jim, really wanted to be at the party so he sent a stand in Jim, complete with ugly sweater. Hilarious!

Rudolph's nose is MIA

According to reports, Phred's sweater came out a few jingle bells short after the party. If that's the worst thing that happened, it's all good.

I wish I could have been there in person but contented myself with updates throughout the night. It went pretty late because the last message came in after I was enjoying my slumbers.

Phred will be home next week. It will be good to see him and someone's already got other clothes waiting for him. I have no doubt that those will be much nicer than his sweater but it was a fun experience.

Ugh, Holiday Stress

2011-12-23T17:52:00.001-07:00

I had two presents left to get for Christmas. Both were available at Tempe Market Place. I pulled out of my complex on the McClintock and promptly got stuck behind a bus. That was stuck behind a gazillion cars going in to the shopping center.

It was insane!

I decided to go in one the entrances off of Rio Salado. The first one was backed up to McClintock, the second wasn't much better and, by the time I got to the third, I had no stomach for it. I decided to head up to Best Buy at Pavilions instead for the one gift. Yes, it was several miles away but I knew I could get in there without any worries.

One slight problem with that plan, though. The Best Buy at Pavilions is closed.

Sonova...at least I enjoyed the spin in my bitching new car but it was a bad day to forget to take my high blood pressure meds. (Which I'm now swallowing with wine. That works, right?)

I ended up at Wal-Mart where I really try not to shop but I knew they would have the gift I wanted. Sometimes, you have to sacrifice your principles for expediency.

My next stop was the grocery store but I stopped off at my parents' house to fortify myself with a few sugar cookies. I also wanted to ask my Mom what I needed to bring for Christmas. I've consistently gotten rolls as my holiday contribution for a while now. Being known as a non-cooker makes it a lot easier on you. Someday, I might actually bake them myself. But, not this year.

The grocery store was remarkably calm and they had all of the checkout lanes open. Nice.

As I drove home, I went by Tempe Marketplace. There was no traffic backup whatsoever. I don't know what made the difference between 3 and 5 PM but I would have expected the latter to be busier. Shows what I know.

Oh, and the second gift I needed got switched to a gift card that I was able to get at the grocery store.

No way am I braving the mall tomorrow.

Book Review - Heat Rises

2011-12-23T14:30:00.000-07:00

Heat Rises by Richard Castle
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Nikki is intent on finding the killer of a Priest when things go all to hell. Her Captain Montrose is acting strangely and blocking her investigation. There are numerous attempts on her life. To top it off, she get suspended. It's up to Nikki and Rook (with a little help from their friends) to find the killer and wrap up an ever expanding conspiracy.

These are really fun books that fictionalize the already fictional characters from Castle. Very entertaining!

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Book Pressure

2011-12-21T23:29:00.003-07:00

I love reading. And, I like all sorts of stuff which makes it easy to find something to read.

Until it's time for me to host book club and pick something for the group. Then, I have no clue what to choose.

The pressure is incredible. You really don't want to be the one who picks a bad book. We don't forget and we don't let the book chooser forget. Just ask Anna about how many times we've thrown The Mystic Masseur back at her. And, I can't even count how many times I've slammed that stupid telepathic gorilla from Ishmael.

I volunteered at the beginning of this month to host the January book club and promised to send out my book selection ASAP. I completely forgot for a week or so then put it on my mental to-do list every day once I remembered. I think it was fear that kept me from actually following through and picking one, though.

Jen sent a polite email today saying, in effect, "Did I miss the email about our next book?" I immediately confessed that she did not miss it because it was never sent and said I would choose and send the email out today.

A promise that I remembered around 10 PM tonight. Doh! I went to Amazon and checked their best sellers. Some of them looked promising but, when I checked the library stock, there was a long wait on them. Besides picking a good book, you have to pick one that can be read for free.

I then went to the New York Times best selling list. An appearance on that list is not always indicative of greatness. Sometimes, hype and awards get people interested even if the book isn't actually that good.

I did find something that I think (I hope!) everyone will enjoy: At Home by Bill Bryson. He's a great writer and the book had really good reviews. There were also a bunch of copies available at the library. That put it in the "Sold!" category for me.

Now, I just hope it doesn't suck.

Kitten Days Revisited

2011-12-21T21:50:00.000-07:00

When I first got George, her birth Mommy's owner sent her home with what I call a crackle ball. It looked like a tin foil ball and it made a cracking sound when you squished it.

We used to play fetch with it every day. I would throw it, she would bat it around then carry it back to me. Repeat, repeat. When I woke up in the morning, she would bring it up on the bed and we started our day by playing fetch.

At some point, all of the crackle balls disappeared and the fetch game stopped. Until tonight.

I bought her a cat stocking at PetSmart this past weekend. 25 toys for something like $3.99. Cheap! As she bugged the crap out of me while I was trying to address my holiday cards on Sunday, I doled out a few toys. She paid a minimal amount of attention to them until tonight when one struck her fancy. (I was still working on cards and not paying attention to her. Coincidence? I think not.)

Go get it, George!

It was another ball, this one with glittery threads on it. She carried it over and dropped it at my feet. I tossed it and she brought it back. Again and again and again.

What fun! Just like the old days. I'm hopeful she won't be bored of it by tomorrow because it's a good game and good exercise for my little Fatty McFatfat.

Fantasy Football - Playoffs Week 2

2011-12-20T10:51:00.003-07:00

Of all the weeks to go up against Drew Brees (5 TDs) and Reggie Bush (career high day of 203 yards), my opponents in both of my leagues had them starting. Needless to say, I did not come out on top. Dang. (I actually said much worse than dang at the time but I've calmed down. A lot.)

Oh, well. Time to play for 3rd and 4th. I’m consoling myself that I’m in the money so I can at least get back some of my entry fees. And, in case you were wondering, I very much want to end up in 3rd rather than 4th, especially in my work league.

Pick ‘Em was bad for everyone with all of the upsets. I’m still in 3rd in the club group and 4th in the work one but too far behind in the latter to get to 3rd and in the money. That’s a bummer since I was in the top two through the middle of the season.

Oh, well. One week to go then I can move on to the stress of following the Packers through the playoffs. We picked a bad time to start falling apart. I was really confident of our return to the Super Bowl all season but I’m not sure Aaron can carry it all the way.

Doubled Up - Twice

2011-12-19T18:13:00.000-07:00

It was a good night at Chick Poker for me. I turned my $20 into $41 and change. Always a good feeling.

The better feeling came from our annual holiday donation. We've collected money in December each year for a while now and collectively donate it to an agreed upon charity. This year, we decided to give it to Season for Sharing which is run by The Arizona Republic and 12 News (a local radio station). The double up is that Gannett matches all donations up to $400,000.

If you're looking for an organization to donate to this holiday season, I suggest checking it out.

Here's the scoop on Season for Sharing from azcentral.com:

We'll Increase Your Donation.
You Increase Their Potential.

Season for Sharing is The Arizona Republic and 12 News' annual holiday fund-raising campaign. Through an eight-week news, editorial, direct mail and ad campaign, readers and viewers are encouraged to donate to the Season for Sharing fund to help human service agencies in Arizona.

Donations are matched through Gannett Foundation and the Nina Mason Pulliam Charitable Trust 50 cents on the dollar until the fund reaches $800,000. The Republic and 12 News cover all administrative and fund-raising costs, so every penny donated, plus the matching dollars, goes directly to local agencies.

Last year, $2.66 million was distributed to 137 agenciesthat help at-risk children and families, improve educational skills, help domestic violence victims and serve the elderly. Since its inception in 1993, Season for Sharing has generated more than $46 million to our community.

When you donate to Season for Sharing, you give more than money... you provide independence, opportunity, inspiration and safety. In these tough economic times, the need is even greater and Season for Sharing is once again there to help.

100 percent of your matched donation will go to agencies throughout the Valley and state. Please give today.

Statement Of The Obvious

2011-12-19T17:08:00.000-07:00

I had crack for lunch today. Which everyone should know is Panda Express Orange Chicken. Man, that stuff is good and when you have a craving for it, there's no satisfying it except to get that completely unhealthy but yummy food.

Here was my fortune cookie: A LONG TIME ADMIRER THINKS HIGHLY OF YOU.

Well, that was insightful. I mean, I worry that my long time admirers don't think well of me. Well, wait, no, I don't worry about that. They're admirers, of course they think highly of me.

Update: THINKS, not THINGS. Doh!

A Holiday Tradition

2011-12-18T21:30:00.000-07:00

My Chick Poker group formed out of a few of us working at Bookstar many years ago. I have so many fond memories of that time and feel fortunate to still be in touch with several co-workers.

One tradition that has carried on, and changed as the members of Chick Poker have, is our annual ornament exchange. Everyone buys an ornament and it's a random assignment of which one you get (they're all wrapped).

It sort of started out with a mixture of funny and nice. And, if you could get a combination of the two, it was a bonus. One year, Chris got this sparkly pear that had a face, arms and legs attached. It was hideous. She actually had it on her tree (in the back) for years until one of her dogs ate it. I also recall a snowman made out of a toilet tissue cardboard that was surprisingly nice. Oh, and there was also the sock monkey, the pickle and the elephant that blew bubbles.

This year found us with the absolutely creepiest, most disturbing ornament ever. Angela bought it and finagled it so that Chris got it. Chris usually gets the weird ones.

Seriously, WTF?

It looked like a cross between Jack Skellington and a fairy. You have to wonder not only who would buy it for real but also who designed it and approved production. It is really unattractive. And, creepy.

Angela took pity on Chris and also gave her a nice, elegant, angel ornament.

It was suggested that Chris take it into work and stick it on the corporate Christmas tree. I would totally do that except ours is in a camera area and I would get busted. She decided to take it to her brother's house, put it on the tree and see how long it takes before someone notices.

Of course, she's worried that it will come alive before then. I suggested she leave it in her carport and, if someone steals it, they have to deal with it being from hell.

Can't wait until next year to see who comes up with the most outrageous ornament.

Holiday Happiness

2011-12-16T18:29:00.000-07:00

I finally had the time to go through all of my mail that's been overflowing my dining room table. The bills I could have done without but the holiday cards were awesome.

I'm all about the cards and newsletters (I wish everyone did one) and the photos. I put the latter up on my fridge but it's getting so crowded (and I don't have enough magnets) that I've had to replace pictures from last year with the new ones from this year.

Hey, your kids are really getting big!

Holiday (yeah, I know, I'm not saying Christmas because not everyone is a Christian but I think everyone likes cards and we do have New Year's which I think most people can get behind as a holiday) cards are great fun to me. I love seeing all the different styles and sentiments. And, their arrival really helps to get me in the holiday spirit.

I'm a freak about my own cards as I buy four or five different types each year then match them to the people I'm sending them to. My recipient list has grown to nearly 100 but I love that I'm adding new people every year. More friends!

My newsletter is written but not printed. No photo for me. While it's tempting to do a picture of George, I'm just not willing to be that crazy cat lady. And, I'm pretty sure Steven won't pose for nnnn mmmmn a family picture.

That nnnn mmmmn in the preceding paragraph was from George sitting on my keyboard, BTW. If I can't keep her off the computer can you just imagine how she'd be during a formal portrait?

One Of Those Days

2011-12-15T16:06:00.000-07:00

If it’s not one thing, it’s another...

I tried to get in to work a little early today. Tried being the operative word. There was an accident somewhere on the 202 and it took me nearly a half hour to get to Priest from McClintock so I could jump on to Washington and take the surface streets to the office. My usual 11-15 minute commute took me 45.

Then, I stopped by the ATM at lunch to get cash for tonight. I opened my wallet and, motherbitches, realized that my debit card was in the back pocket of the jeans I wore last night. I filled my gas tank before going home and didn’t put the card away.

My 1 PM meeting was across the street and I needed my badge to get in to the gate. At least I realized that I didn’t have the badge with me before I crossed the street but I had to hike back to get my purse so I could get my badge out of my car. I’ve already gotten used to the remote entry so it didn’t occur to me that it wouldn’t work without the key at least in my pocket. By the time I got there, it was 1:05 and I hate being late.

Finally, I was checking my calendar to see what I needed to worry about because I had a tentative vacation day marked for tomorrow. Something made me check how many days I have left and I only have one, not the two I was expecting.

I’m trying to focus on the positives.

It wasn’t me in the accident.

My friend T was in the car with me at the ATM and he loaned me $100.

Even though I was late, the meeting hadn’t started yet. And, it got out early. Bonus!

I didn’t take tomorrow off so I didn’t screw myself out of taking December 23rd off. That will give me time for last minute shopping that’s not on Christmas Eve.

Yin and yang and all that rot. I just hope tonight doesn’t bring me any unhappy surprises.

Saint Lucia Day

2011-12-13T22:19:00.000-07:00

Our Croatian friends invited us over to celebrate Saint Lucia's Feast Day today. I confess that, really horrible former Catholic that I am, I had no idea who Saint Lucia was.

Reading Wikipedia's story about her, I have to say "Poor thing!"

What our friends told us was that today was the planting of the wheat. Apparently, you take some wheat seed, put it in a bowl and keep it lightly watered until Christmas day where it becomes your centerpiece for the table. If your wheat grows thick and strong, you're going to have a good year.

Looks a little like breakfast cereal.

They gave us each a bowl, some cotton balls and a bag of wheat seed. I tasted one of the seeds, BTW, and you wouldn't want to eat those. You shred up the cotton bowls so they'll store the water and put them at the bottom of the bowl, spread the seed on top then wet all of it.

I've got mine safely at home and will do my best to water it. I fear that if it does grow, George will eat it so I will lack a decent centerpiece.

The best part of the evening was spending time with our friends, meeting some new people and having great eats. We had stuffed cabbage, sausage and really good sauerkraut. Oh, and some mighty fine Croatian beer and cherry wine.

Good times, good times.

Fantasy Football - Playoff Week One

2011-12-13T16:48:00.002-07:00

Whoohoo! I'm a big winner!

Thanks to a 37 point week from Maurice Jones-Drew (I love that little guy so much), I bested my opponent in the club league by a score of 117-92. I was playing Crash's son Matt who drafted Aaron Rodgers with the first pick. Fortunately for me, the Packers scored a boatload of points this week but Aaron's points were only so-so.

I haven't heard Matt's reaction to the game yet but he's got to be bummed that his 10-3 team lost to my 7-5-1 team. It's just like the NFL, on any given day any team can beat another.

I'm on to play my friend Eileen in the next round. She's got a stellar team and finished first in our division. I have to hope that Drew Brees takes it easy next week or I can get in a deep hole, fast.

I was talking to two of my buddies in the work league last week and I wasn't very optimistic with my chances. My opponent was projected to score over 150 points and I think I was somewhere less than 110. I think the projections on NFL.com aren't very good and the final score reinforced that feeling as I won 132.14 to 117.9.

Both of my buds had agreed that my team was pretty weak and one of them said, "I hope you win because I'm playing you next week if you do." Well, he got what he wished for but I hope to be able to say something snarky after I win. Oh, please, football gods, let me win.

My team name of The Injury Report was shown to be true, unfortunately. I've been waiting for Adrian Peterson to get healthy so it hurts a lot that I lost Greg Jennings for the rest of my season. I'm really down to no good starting options. I'm also playing against Brees in that game so I REALLY need him to play like shite. Or, get pulled out to save him for the post-season.

I'm so mad at myself in Pick 'Em. I made my picks then thought too much and changed two of them. I should have gone with my first instincts as I would have held on to third place in the club game and I'm losing ground on third in the work game.

Yes, This Is One Of My Best Friends...

2011-12-11T19:39:00.001-07:00

...so I got that going for me.

I'm thinking of starting a new blog called "Crash Stories" where we can all post tales about our friend who just does stuff that makes you shake your head. Her friend, Patti, calls her FTW for Frakking Train Wreck and it fits. As Crash and I have discussed, it's a good thing she's so likable.

Last weekend, Crash and I hatched a plan for the Arizona Parrot Head Club Holiday party that was last night. She was going to work during the day and I was going to meet her at her house at 4 PM so we could drive together to the BOD meeting before the party and she would be my DD as I would then stay the night at her house.

I got to her house right at 4, unloaded all of my crap and walked to her front door. Where, I knocked. And, knocked again. And, once more for the hell of it. I pulled out my phone and called her and it went to voice mail. I then sent her a text asking where she was. One more call to her phone for good measure went unanswered.

My first assumption was that she was driving home from work and, since she works in insurance, she won't answer her phone while driving. So, I gave her a few minutes. But, then I thought "Knowing my dear friend, she might have forgotten." I then called Tammy, our party hostess, and asked if Crash was there. She said she wasn't and I explained why I called.

Just as I was picking up all of my crap to take it back to my car and drive over by myself, my cell rang. The ID said it was Tammy but that's not whose voice I heard. "She found me!" I just shook my head. Then, Crash said, "I'm going to come get you because I need to get my phone because I left it at home."

Well, that explains why she didn't answer her phone nor reply to my text.

My reply was, "You WILL come get me regardless of the phone."

Turns out, she had walked in the door at the party and Tammy asked her "Where's Pfister?" Her blank stare was enough to give away that she had completely forgotten the plan.

Oh, and it's my fault because I didn't remind her. Of a plan we made six days ago. When we were sober. I'm such a bad friend.

As the party went on, I switched from Miller Lite to Gluhwein and was feeling no pain. Crash hadn't been drinking until she remembered that she left her Shotski at home. Again, it was my fault that I didn't remind her. She and Tracy went to retrieve and my DD went to hell as soon as they were back.

Four of the new AZPHC BOD members - does that inspire confidence?

I don't know how many shots she did but people started coming up to me and suggesting that I may need to drive home. Really? I guess I hold my liquor better than I thought because I had no interest in driving. My plan was that we would just stay over on the futon and go home in the morning.

Late Night Dominos

It was down to the Last Men Standing (technically one man and five girls) when they decided to play Dominos. Poor Overachiever who was trying to figure out the game. Crash was on her ass like no one's business. Yes, I believe alcohol was a factor.

After what seemed like a day but was probably only two hours, the game concluded and Crash was sober enough to drive home. I'd spent the last hour dozing on the couch. We either left or got home to Crash's at 2:40 AM. I know I looked at the time but I don't remember when. But, hey, we made it home and none the worse for wear.

It is a good thing she's so likable. ;-)

Next time, I'm reminding her every day for a week leading up to our next plan.

Merry Christmas To Me!

2011-12-11T18:34:00.001-07:00

I just spent more money on a car than I ever have in my life. And, I'm not even sad about it. But, I will be poor.

My 2004 Sonata was at 98,000 miles and needed new tires and some front squeaky stuff fixed. The squeaky stuff was going to be several hundred dollars, the tires the same and I was going to have to do several 100,000 mile services soon.

It all came to a head when I was getting the oil changed two weeks ago. As the tech was showing me the upcoming services, I started thinking it was time for a new car. Then, one of the guys said I had a piece of metal in one of my tires so I headed off to Discount Tire in the hopes they could repair it.

They could, and did, repair it but they said I needed all new tires and showed me how low the treads were. I said, "How long will they last because I just decided to trade this in and I'm going to do it this month." The dude looked at me like I was crazy because one of the tires was totally cracked on the sidewall and you could see in to the core of it. I replaced that tire with the cheapest one they had then seriously started looking for my next car.

It wasn't a big search, though. As soon as I saw the 2011 Sonatas last year, I knew I wanted one. They are so bitching looking, got great reviews and well, they're bitching looking. I talked myself out of it because I didn't have a car payment and my car was still good. And, nice looking. But, not bitching.

So, I looked at all of the Sonata models and hoped I could get the middle one with a sunroof in either Black, Harbor Grey or Indigo Blue. Those were really my only criteria. I checked the online inventory of the dealers in Phoenix and found the biggest selection at Hyundai of Tempe.

I called them on Friday and gave the guy my basics. He asked if I wanted GPS, or the Nav system or leather, etc. and I said I didn't want them but I wasn't averse to getting them. We made a plan for me to come in today and, since he wasn't working, he gave me the sales manager's name to talk to.

When I got there this afternoon, the sales manager told me there was a new potential on the lot for me. It was a 2011 and had been a loaner car. There were only 4,600 miles on it. It was the top model in the series and had pretty much everything.

Here's a (partial because I can't remember it all) list:

Sunroof

GPS (you have no idea how much I need this unless you've driven with me or I've called you because I'm lost)

XM Radio with fancy sound system (CD player, 16 XM presets, 12 FM presets, 6 AM presets)

Rearview camera

Leather seats

Bluetooth

Heated seats (both front and back)

Dual zone A/C

A/C vents and controls in the back seat

Remote keyless entry

Fancy alloy rims

Sport tires

Compass on the rearview mirror (I really need this, too, but I also need to learn how to figure out which direction I should be going)

Automatic headlamps

Power seats (they even go up and down, not just front and back)

Telescopic steering wheel (you can adjust close, far, up and down)

iPod connection

Bitching!

Fancy!

I'm in love

I think I saved $6,000 or $7,000 by going with the 2011. Of course, I wouldn't have gone all out on a 2012 so I ultimately probably paid a little more than I would have with a 2012 but I got every thing I wanted, needed and more.

The sales guy helped me sync my Droid to the car so I called Sugar Daddy on the way home and filled him in on my purchase. Then, I headed to my parents' and called Steven from the car and told him to get everyone to come outside. He knew what I was up to but my parents did not.

Shorty, as you can imagine since he buys a new car like every other month (or so it seems), was thrilled and is sure I'm going to love this car. I'm sure he's right. Steven had to take it for a drive (he confirmed that it does have pep) and wanted to play with the remote entry and startup. I escaped the family and called Dawnie on the way home. It was super easy to transfer the call back to my phone when I got home. I'm going to love the bluetooth!

I'm really looking forward to those heated seats tomorrow morning. Because, I'll probably only need them a half dozen times a year and this is definitely the week for them.

Book Review - Spell Bound

2011-12-10T08:56:00.001-07:00

Spell Bound by Kelley Armstrong
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Gosh, we're really up to 12 books in this series? They've been fun reading.

This one, like the last, focuses on the young witch, Savannah. Her unspoken thought to give up her powers if a family could be reunited is heard and acted on by another. Without her magic, she's left to investigating a group of supernaturals that want to come out of hiding and look to have nefarious plans in doing so.

We've seen Savannah grow up in these books and she's a fun, tough but annoyingly stubborn character. She and Adam (the guy she's been in love with since she was 12) are a great team with their constant teasing, drinking and adventures. Those two crazy kids should get together.

The ending is set up to lead right to the next book as there's a battle of supernaturals brewing. I'm looking forward to reading it.

View all my reviews

New Dish For The Rotation

2011-12-09T11:10:00.001-07:00

I get a box of organic fruits and vegetables delivered to my house every two weeks. There's always some sort of green (chard, kale, collard, etc.). I discovered early on that whatever green you get, it tastes good cooked with bacon, onion and garlic so that's what I always do. The exception is mustard greens. I have no idea how to make those taste good. They taste like dirty weeds to me.

As I was watching Chopped's Lunch Ladies episode, I saw a new way to prepare greens. One of the ladies does Pasta Monday at her school because pasta is an inexpensive way to provide a very filling dish and some of her students don't get a lot to eat over the weekend. She had collard greens to work with and she sliced them into thin strips, added a bunch of other stuff and tossed in pasta. It looked delicious and the judges really liked it.

So, I picked up some penne at the store and waited for my next delivery. It came yesterday and included was green chard. I was good to go.

I cooked the diced onion and garlic with ground up hot Italian sausage and a shake or two of Italian spice mix then waited until the penne was nearly done. Then I put the strips of chard into my sausage mix and it only took a few minutes to cook it down. The sausage had enough fat to coat everything nicely without being too greasy. I then folded in the penne (no rinsing) and, voila, it was done.

Delish! I had it for dinner last night and leftovers for lunch today. Still yummy.

Good stuff

I should have taken a picture of how it looked on the plate last night. Much prettier. I also put a little bit of dried parmeson on it and that was a nice finishing touch.

If you haven't watched the Chopped Lunch Ladies episode, you really should. It was eye-opening to see the challenges they face trying to work with the food they're given (they don't always have a lot of leeway) while providing a healthy, low cost meal to their students. It's much easier to go low cost if you're willing to skimp on nutrition and taste but those women weren't willing to do that. Very inspirational.

It was also eye-opening to hear about how many of their students are on food assistance programs. We're not doing a very good job of properly feeding our youth. Heck, I don't think we're doing a very good job at feeding a lot of our citizens.

The Fictional Donald Story

2011-12-08T20:54:00.001-07:00

This is a story about Fictional Donald. Yes, that's his official name because I declared it to be so.

We have to start the story many years ago. My friend Russ would tell me how I needed to meet his old college buddy, Donald, because we would totally hit it off. My response was always, "So, when is Donald coming out to visit?" Because, allegedly, Donald lived in Texas. I say allegedly because Russ would say, "Oh, he's coming this year." And, the year would pass with no signs of Donald.

I began to have my doubts about this Donald dude so I started referring to him as Fictional Donald. Russ did his best to convince me he was real. He showed me old school pictures, tried to call Fictional Donald from Mexico one year (alcohol was involved) and finally got a hold of him one New Year's Eve.

We were at Crime Dog and Vivian's house when Russ handed me the phone and said, "This is Donald." I said into the phone, "So, you're some guy that Russ is paying to pretend to be Donald?" He assured me he was, indeed, Donald, and we talked for a few minutes. I was laughing the whole time because I refused to acknowledge he was a real Donald. Or, the real Donald, however you want to look at it.

The funny thing is, as I recall, we were already connected. There's a parrot head site (Facebook like) called Meet The Phlockers. Tkay told me Fictional Donald was on there so we connected. I maintained that Russ created the profile and there was still no Donald. A while after that we became Facebook friends but I still said he was a fake.

We're now up to last year in the story. It was Russ' 50th birthday and Tkay was throwing him a party. Unfortunately, the party was on the same night as the Arizona Parrot Head Club's holiday party and, as outgoing President, I felt obligated to be there.

However, Fictional Donald was scheduled to fly in on Friday (the party was Saturday) so I took off early from work and drove down. I was waiting outside Tkay's house when she got back from the airport with FD. As I walked up the driveway, he noticed me and said "I know this girl!" (Or, something like that, it was a year ago.)

Together at last

Russ was right, we totally hit it off. We picked on each other the whole night. ;-) Russ' cousin was also in town for the birthday bash so the five us headed to Fourth Avenue in Tucson for their big arts festival. Well, mostly for beers. We then headed back to Russ and Tkay's house for dinner with Russ' Mom and Aunt. Then, it was time for more beers. The whole evening I still called him Fictional Donald, though. I am stubborn.

Tired Boy

We hung out by the firepit in the backyard. Poor, FD. He was working third shift at the time and hadn't slept for something like 36 hours. Being the unkind person that I am, I had to capture the moment. This was actually a prominent picture on his Facebook page for a while before he figured out how to remove the tag.

I headed back up to Phoenix the next day but our connection didn't stop. FD called me on Saturday night after both of our parties to prove he could stay up late. That was the first of many late night conversations. I'm a night owl and he didn't have a lot to keep him occupied at work so we would talk a lot. For a while, I was logging over 200 minutes a month to Houston.

I tried to figure out when we could hang out in person next and decided that Riddles in the Sand, a parrot head event in Galveston Bay, would be ideal. Tkay was in but I had to convince Russ. I waited until he was really toasted after a party then threw the idea out there. It stuck though I had to reinforce it with an executive decision ("I made the hotel reservations, we're going.").

Slivo Shots at Donald's House

So, Russ, Tkay and I headed to Texas where FD picked us up from the airport and we spent the first night at his house. He showed me all of his IDs. Driver's license, passport, fake passport and even an old school ID. I decided that he was the real Donald but I just couldn't drop the Fictional Donald name.

By this point, most of my peeps knew the Fictional Donald story. What they didn't know was that he decided to come out for Labor Day weekend and our Parrot Grande event. I manually slipped his name on to the registration list where it took one day for both the Treasurer and the PG Co-Chair to notice.

Everyone has the option to put their nickname on their PG badge. FD did not have that option. I put down Fictional Donald, of course.

There was a great amount of surprise when Russ and Tkay showed up with FD in tow. It was no surprise, however, that FD fit right in. I'm not even sure how many Facebook friends he made before the weekend was over but he was universally adored.

Our Chippendales

He even came in costume! The theme was Saturday Night Live and he was ready. We all had a great time and he partied with people all over the resort. For weeks afterwards, I heard about how much fun he was.

Why do I tell the tale now? Well, we're having our holiday party on Saturday and FD teased me by saying he might come out for it. Then, I saw an article in the paper today about the Fourth Avenue arts festival in Tucson this weekend.

He's not coming and it makes me sad. But, I'm enjoying reliving the memories of last year and the fun we had. And, I've no doubt that we have more fun to come.

Do We Look Like Singers?

2011-12-07T08:23:00.001-07:00

A few of us went up to Lake Havasu for the weekend to see the boat parade (lighted boats going down the river - pretty!).

Everyone but me brought their Santa hats to wear for the weekend. Crash loaned me hers on Friday and she wore her Buckeye hat instead so we were all decked out.

I can't tell you how many times someone asked us to either sing a song or asked if we were caroling. It was a bunch.

In my gang, it's not unusual for people to wear their Santa hats frequently in December. I think Goat and Queen wear their hats every time they go out. And, they seemed very appropriate for the holiday boat parade.

Come on, doesn't everyone dress this way?

But, Bacon Is Always Supposed To Be Good!

2011-12-06T17:12:00.001-07:00

I never thought I’d say this but it appears some things are better without bacon. I know, it’s near blasphemy.

The Rocket Scientist and I went to D&B for Monday Night Football last night. It was bitterly cold (for us Phoenicians) and I didn’t have a jacket on. My heavy sweater wasn’t enough to combat the elements so I was pretty chilled by the time I got inside.

Since they took my favorite item off the menu (pulled pork sliders), I always have to peruse the entire menu since I can’t find a new favorite. (#firstworldproblems) The Mac and Cheese seemed like a great choice in both warming and comfort food.

Here’s the official description:

Grilled seasoned chicken breast and applewood smoked bacon tossed with Cavatappi pasta and a creamy aged sharp cheddar cheese sauce. Topped with a garlic breadcrumb crust and baked until brown and bubbly.

Sounds yummy, no?

I got it and started eating but was soon more picking at it. The cheese sauce was good but I lost interest about half way through. Of course, the Red Velvet cake from work yesterday might have impacted my appetite. I got the rest of it boxed to take home.

This morning, I heated up the leftovers for breakfast. And, found myself picking through the dish again. I realized that I was subconsciously avoiding the bacon and seeking out the chicken and the pasta.

It could have been that the bacon was undercooked as it wasn’t at all crispy. Or, it was the combination of bacon and cheese. It could also have been that it just wasn’t good bacon.

Regardless, I tossed a bunch of it in the garbage. What a waste of what I consider to be one of the few perfect foods.

You Can't Let Down Your Guard With a Demon

2011-12-06T13:29:00.001-07:00

Brrr, it’s really cold here. Last week was much nicer. So much so that I left the front door open in the morning while I was eating breakfast to get some fresh air in the house.

On Wednesday morning, I was calmly eating my cereal at the dining room table when some people had the absolute nerve to hang out in the common area across my sidewalk and talk to each other. George was in an uproar! That’s clearly not appropriate behavior in her world.

She jumped up on the table (I’ve given up trying to keep her off, yes, she’s the owner and I’m the slave) so she could peer out the door and growl. Not very loudly, of course. They might have a chance of hearing her then.

I got up to get something out of my bedroom and, when I came back, she was whisker deep into the cereal bowl and enjoying every lap of milk.

I just had to laugh. What a dope! She was sitting right there and I just left my breakfast unprotected. I deserved to lose some of it for stupidity alone.

For the record, she did get shooed off the table at that point. I’m not a total wimp at discipline. Just mostly a wimp.

Fantasy Football - Week 13

2011-12-06T08:34:00.001-07:00

This was the last week of the regular season in both of my fantasy leagues.

I was ahead by 2 points in the club league going into last night's game. I just needed Maurice Jones-Drew to not lose any points. I shouldn't have worried. The dude was on fire and ended up with 24 points. I also got Chris Johnson to give me 27 points. I guess he's decided to play now.

Now, it's on to the playoffs! I squeaked in to the last playoff spot and I'm up against the number three seed who happens to be Crash's son. And, who has Aaron Rodgers. That will be an ulcer inducing matchup.

In the work league, I went into last night's game with a 20+ point lead and my opponent only had Rivers going. Based on his inconsistency, I thought I had a chance. It turned out to be no chance at all. He lit it up and had me beat at the beginning of the third quarter.

I finished in 3rd place and go up against the 6th place team in the first round of the playoffs. While I would love to win out in both leagues, this is the one I want to win the most. It would be awesome after starting 3-0 and being decimated by injuries to take the trophy. BTW, my team name is still The Injury Report. I started winning (and losing even more players) after I changed it so it's staying that way.

I had another crappy week in Pick 'Em. I'm still in third place in the club game but there's someone one point behind me. I dropped down to 4th in the work game which is out of the money. I need some good weeks coming up.

Always Keep Them Guessing

2011-12-01T16:32:00.001-07:00

Our dress code at work is very relaxed. I spend the warm months in capri pants, sandals and somewhat nice blouses or shirts. I do sneak in the occasional t-shirt but not one with writing. Winter finds me in jeans, leather shoes or Sketchers and sweaters.

Today, I came in wearing a nice sweater, a wool herringbone skirt, tights and dress shoes. Eyebrows were raised.

I ran into our VP in the hallway and he was wearing dress slacks and shoes and a long sleeved button down shirt. Since he’s usually a casual dresser like me, it warranted a “Hey, we’re both dressed up today.” comment from me.

His response was, “I’ll tell you why I’m dressed if you tell me why you’re dressed up.” I gave him a non-verbal go ahead and he told me that he and a couple others were going to a local hospital to try to get a sales deal from them.

I didn’t tell him why I was dressed up.

Most of my co-workers commented on my attire and the comments ranged from “you like nice” to “I’ve never seen you in a skirt.” But, you could tell they were wondering.

My lunch buddies were much more direct. “So, do you have an interview today?” They were even more convinced when I said I had to be back in time for a 1:30 appointment.

The reality is that I like to dress up more in winter so most of my dress clothes are geared towards that season. I can wear most of the sweaters I wear with my jeans but they look nicer paired with a skirt and tights. And, I quite like wearing tights.

Oh, and my 1:30 appointment was with my boss and a co-worker to talk to an outside consultant.

But, I think it was good to get them all thinking. They might be less likely to take me for granted if they think I’m pursuing outside offers. Or, they might be thinking, “Woot!”, maybe she’ll finally leave. ;-)

Mental note made today, though. No narrow skirts on days when I go to lunch with my friend, T. He drives a fairly high off the ground truck and there is no graceful way to get into it without hiking my skirt up to nearly my girly parts.

Missed It By That Much

2011-11-30T16:38:00.000-07:00

I set a goal halfway through this year to average at least one blog post per day for every month. It didn’t matter what the post was. It could be a story, a book review, a picture. It was all about getting the frequency up.

I was doing pretty well until November. Between a week in Key West and coming back to 11 hour work days, I just didn’t have the energy to post a lot. Thank the gods for book reviews. I had a lot of those to get me close to my quota so I didn’t feel like a complete slacker.

Now, you may ask why, if I had time to read so much, why didn’t I have time to create original posts? Well, it all comes down to mental effort. It’s much easier to read a frothy book about vampires or werewolves than it is to try to put together an articulate and entertaining (hopefully) story for a post. It’s even easier to watch TV then to read so most November evenings found me vegging on the couch because I was too drained to do much else.

Hopefully, I’ll get back on track for December. Why it’s important to me, I don’t exactly know. I think at the time I set the goal it was a way for me to make sure I got original writing structured in to my schedule. Now, it’s just stubbornness. And, that’s nothing new in my world.

Peppers of Key West

2011-11-29T21:42:00.001-07:00

There should be a city ordinance in Key West that you must visit Peppers during your stay on the island. It's just that fantastic!

What is Peppers? Well, it's a sauce and spice store with its own tasting bar. What you need to do is bring a 12 pack (or more) of beer with you when you go and you should share with the Peppers' employees. They'll let you store your beer in their fridge and you're going to want to drink it all because those sauces can get damn hot.

Tracy has the right idea - always keep a backup beer at Peppers.

They start you off with some mild yet interesting selections. Based on your response, they will either go hotter or more to the sweet or more to the BBQ. It really is catered to your tastes. We, despite some diversions, always end up with the super hot as our ultimate destination. So hot that they'll only give it to you on a toothpick and they're very specific as to where you should apply the toothpick to your tongue.

Tkay with the really hot stuff.

As you go through each sauce sample, you set aside the ones you really like. At the end of it all, your friendly Peppers peep will retrieve all of you favorites, box them up and ship them home for you. Oh, you do have to pay for them. They're worth every reasonably priced penny because they really do add a lot of flavor and variety to your cooking once you're home.

Yeah, some of them are that hot.

There's something for everyone there; it's not all hot stuff. They have some great spice rubs, some lovely dipping sauces and my favorite steak sauce of all time. It's called Ring Of Fire and it's full of flavor and spice but it won't burn your taste buds off.

The remains of our tasting.

It's really quite the party atmosphere. In addition to getting to taste a lot of product, you get jokes (and they can be really dirty if you ask), recipe and cooking ideas and wonderful memories.

How much fun? Well, check out their recycle bin. This is a party place!

I try to bring every Key West virgin there every year. It's partly because I want them to experience it but it's also because I just have a great time every visit.

Movie Review - Fast Food Nation

2011-11-29T19:38:00.001-07:00

I finally got around to seeing this 2006 film. Wow. It's a massive indictment. An indictment of what, you may ask? Well, let's see. The fast food industry, obviously. The US cattle industry, corporate greed, treatment of illegal immigrants, ineffective eco-warrior wannabes and selling out to "The Man" are also thoroughly bashed.

Most of the story takes place in a town in Colorado that has the cattle slaughterhouse that provides all of the meat for the Big One from fast food chain Mickey's. While it looks safe and clean on the surface, it's actually filled with dangers both to humans and to the meat they eat. The workforce is also made up of many illegal immigrants who are paid in cash and then tossed aside when they're no longer useful.

Clearly, this is a big issue for celebrities as there are some famous names in here and some of them play small roles. Kris Kristofferson, Ethan Hawke, Bruce Willis and Avril Lavigne are some of the cameos.

There's a powerful message in here about the safety of our food chain and how the almighty dollar affects that process.

Demon Cat Strikes Again

2011-11-29T18:00:00.001-07:00

Apparently, George has been bored of late as she really had to go looking for something bad to do.

I got my new cell phone a year ago. The cord is just a tad short from the wall plug to my bedside table so I put an extension cord in the mix.

In the past few weeks, I could hear George gnawing on something in my room and I finally figured out what it was. There were two tags on the cord. One the big don't sue us if you're stupid warning and the other a little tag with I don't know what on it.

Why, after a year of it being there did she decide to chew on it? I have no idea but the chewing wasn't all that was going on. She also pulled the cord out of the socket. But, I didn't realize that right away.

I plugged in my phone late one night this weekend and the little lightening bolt didn't show it was charging. I tried reinserting the cord several times before I thought to trace it back to the wall.

After a "Godammit, George!", I went to the kitchen for a pair of scissors and cut the tags off. I thought it would be the end of that.

Nope. Last night, she was back at the cord again. Not chewing on it but batting at it. I'm pretty sure she was trying to unplug it. Does she really hate my cell phone that much that she doesn't want it to charge?

Fantasy Football - Week 12

2011-11-29T17:10:00.001-07:00

A tie is like kissing your sister. So, I've heard. I don't have one to kiss. But, Woody and I managed to tie in our club league game at 103 points. I still have a chance to make the playoffs but I think I need a win this week. Not bad for a record of 6-5-1. Kind of like the real NFL.

I had a nice win in the work league.My 7-5 record has me solely in 3rd place. If I can win and the 2nd place team loses, I think I have a bye in the first round of the playoffs.

A fairly good Pick 'Em week has me back up to third place in the club game and tied for 3rd in the work game. And, I think I had the high score (based on tie breakers) at work so I should be getting some dinero for that. Sweet!

Oh, but I have to whine about injuries. I picked up Kevin Smith from the Lions last week. Guess who went out in the first quarter with an injury? If that rat bastage could have run for 10 more yards before going out, I would have won my game.

Please, sir. May I have some more?

2011-11-27T23:01:00.001-07:00

Or, whatever the frak the exact quote is.

This four day weekend couldn't have come at a better time for me. Work has been crazy and my social calendar has been fully booked. It was so nice to have some down time.

Not that I didn't have things to do. Or, that I didn't add things in.

Thursday was great. I slept in a tad, rode my exercise bike, did my hair (back to red!), watched my Green Bay Packers win over the Detroit Lions then went to my parents' house for dinner with our extended family. Steven and I managed to get all (too much for the amount of people there) of the food on the table at the right temperatures. I also banned any talk of illness, surgery or death of someone that Steven and I had never heard of from the table in exchange for us giving up the kids' table. It was nice.

I got home about 8:30 and my neighbor to the front heard me walk up. She called over her fence, "Hey Kathy, my friend Angel and I are about to get into the hot tub. Want to come over?" I thought about it for about 15 seconds and decided that sounded like a pleasant end to the evening so I said I'd be over after I changed into my suit.

My only mistake was in leaving my front door open with just the security door locked. George pathetically cried. It was sad. The hot tub had a heating issue so the three of us ending up drinking, talking, singing and dancing until 1:30 in the morning. I got a sternly worded message from George when I woke up at 8:30 to find she had vomited up some cat food right by my shoes. Thankfully, it was on tile. But, I now understand that the neighbor is off limits.

Friday was a sleep in (I did got to be bed at 1:30), bike, read and clear the DVR day. I finally had to hit the shower at 2 so I could head out a little after 3 to meet my friends for Chick Poker. Man, what a fun night! I think each of us had tears of laughter at least once during the evening. I know I did more than once.

Saturday was a day of sloth. I read 3 1/2 books and made a bigger dent in the DVR recorded list. I didn't even hit the shower until 6PM and I went from one pair of pajamas to another without any day clothes in between. BTW, I watched the first three episodes of Hell On Wheels back to back and I really like the show. Of course, I'm partial to liking anything with Colm Meaney in it but I truly enjoyed it.

It was the most relaxing day I've had in months. Seriously, I've had something to do every day since I don't know when. It was delightful to just relax, never leave the house and do whatever I felt like.

I need more days like that but I don't see any in my future for weeks to come.

Sunday was a fairly early wakeup because I just can't turn off my internal alarm clock. I was up, showered and dressed in no time so I did some minor chores like taking out the garbage, cleaning out the fridge and cleaning the kitchen (including the microwave which, man, how many things have exploded in there anyway?).

I headed over to Barb's for a Miche purse party at 2 and thoroughly enjoyed a long afternoon with Barb, Crash, Leslie and Kay. The long afternoon turned into evening with Crash, Barb and John and it was delightful. I love spending time with my friends. As much as I enjoyed being alone (well, not quite since George was glued to me) on Saturday, I enjoyed being with people on Sunday.

So, that brings me to tonight. I have a shitload of work to do before the end of the year. But, I find myself wondering what time to set my alarm. It's usually 6 AM but the past two weeks it's been 5 so I can get into work early. And still stay late. Sigh.

I'm going to go with 5:30. And, I'm hoping it's not another 11 hour day. But, it's a short week since I'm heading out of town again this weekend. As much fun as that is, I think I'm still going to look back at this weekend and wonder how I can arrange my life so that four days off in a row is much more common.

Because, I need those. Badly.

Book Review - Undead and Undermined

2011-11-27T09:48:00.001-07:00

Undead and Undermined by MaryJanice Davidson
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

I'm starting to get to the point where I don't understand why Betsy has any friends at all. She's become so annoying. She does all of this harebrained stuff, cuts off everyone who's trying to explain things to her and can't articulate her own thoughts. Davidson wrote this book as a second part to a story trilogy (this is actually the 10th book in the series). I'll read the next one but then I may be done.

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Phred's (Latest) Big Adventure

2011-11-27T08:25:00.001-07:00

Phred in Florida

The Arizona Parrot Head Club has a long time mascot named Phred. Phred was liberated from a garage sale by club members Moose and Carol years ago. A peg-legged parrot pirate seemed to fit in with us very well.

As time went by, Phred came to a lot of club events, travelled to locations far and near and accumulated enough of a wardrobe that he needed his own travel bag. He also freeloaded off of several members' households until he ended up at the Queen and Goat's house.

The Queen decided it was time for Phred to get back some actual mascot work instead of just hanging out in a closet so she started bringing him to events again. It was good to see him mingling with club members and posing for pictures with complete strangers who found him entertaining.

As we were getting ready to head for Meeting of The Minds in Key West, the Queen asked Crash to take Phred with her and get lots of pictures of him enjoying the convention. Now, this is where everyone who knows Crash is asking, "What the hell was the Queen thinking?" With good reason.

Crash and Phred stayed with Patti and Keith from Washington. Their drive down the Keys was punctuated with frequent Phred photo opps. To say Patti and Keith liked with Phred was an understatement. They were head over heels in love with the little guy.

Phred's mode of transportation

As the week went on, Phred had a grand old time. Crash carried him around in a bag on her back and he went on a sunset cruise on Wednesday and hit the bars with the gang and he was in on all of the action.

Until the fateful night of shark fishing. While under the influence of alcohol, some of our Iowa friends and Crash decided that Saturday night would be a good time to go shark fishing Of course, Phred had to go along despite Patti's instincts that it was a bad idea.

Crash had brought a bottle of Tequila on the boat to celebrate their shark catching success. When the sharks showed no sign of biting, the Tequila was broken out and consumed. (They did end up catching one small shark.) Somewhere during that time, a plan was hatched.

When we met up at the condo late that night, Dawnie confessed. "We stole Phred and we're taking him back to Iowa." I was like, "Oh, man, that's funny but Crash is going to freak!"

The next day, I hooked up with Crash and there was no mention of Phred being missing. I thought maybe she hadn't noticed. After we got home and time went by, there was still no mention. I then thought maybe they relented and gave him back or that she hadn't unpacked enough to know he was missing.

It had all really slipped my mind until I called Dawnie while they were all decorating a tree and she said they had a member of our club there with us. I told her she had to post a picture and tag Crash in it. At that point, I was leaning towards the theory that Crash didn't know he was missing. I did still think it was all funny.

What I didn't know was that Crash and the Overachiever had gone hot tubbing that night after shark fishing and Crash left her bag there. The bag that she had been keeping Phred in. She asked Tracy to bring it home and told her Phred was in it.

When Tracy got to the airport in Lauderdale, she checked the bag. No Phred. She told Crash who started freaking out. Both she and Patti were pretty sure Phred was at the bottom of the ocean or had become shark bait himself.

What was she going to tell the Queen?

It was all kept on the down low. Crash got home and confessed to Barb who got on eBay looking for a new Phred. Of course, there were none to be found.

The next idea was to spin a tale about Phred being lost at sea but not before he fathered another parrot who could become our next mascot. Barb even had several parrot replacements.

Before Phred's reappearance in Iowa, Crash had to confess. The membership committee got together to make badges and I'm not sure if the Queen asked or if Crash's latent Catholic guilt got to her and she just spilled but the sad story came out. I'm sure the Queen took it with her usual grace. She was actually planning a memorial at the club holiday party for him.

You can imagine the thrill Crash got when she finally found out Phred was living the high life in Iowa and not at the bottom of the Atlantic. If only she'd waited a few more days before confessing, she would have been in the clear. But, it would be less of a story.

We talked about having a Phred resurrection at the party and figured the Pirate Captain could rig something up where he would rise out of the ground or down from the air. It was all to be a big surprise to the Queen.

However, Patti created a Phred Parrot (go be friends!) profile and pictures of him started popping up. Crash thought the Queen knew he was back so we scratched our second coming plans.

But, the Queen didn't know. I got an email from her on Thanksgiving asking about the Phred profile and I sent Crash a text asking if I could tell the story. She said sure and I was planning on doing it this weekend. Then, I got another email early this morning from the Queen asking again about the profile so I figured I better get the whole tale out there.

So, here it is. Phred's latest adventure. This is actually not the first time he was kidnapped either. Many years ago, he ended up in San Diego but that's someone else's story to tell.

Unless we need him back before then, I think he'll be retrieved in February when we make a trek to the frozen lakes of Minnesota. And, no, I won't let him get anywhere near the polar bear dipping.

Book Review - Specials

2011-11-26T19:21:00.001-07:00

Specials by Scott Westerfeld
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

I liked this book the least of the three. Yes, we got closure but we also got beat about the head and shoulders on the concept of free will.

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Book Review - Pretties

2011-11-26T19:18:00.001-07:00

Pretties by Scott Westerfeld
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

The second in the series. Tally has gone back to the city to become a Pretty so she can test the "cure". But, will she want to take it when her Pretty life is everything she dreamed of and more? This was an interesting chapter to the story.

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Book Review - A Discovery of Witches

2011-11-26T11:38:00.001-07:00

A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

I read a lot of great reviews of this book and my friend loaned me her copy ages ago but I just got around to reading it this weekend. While I think the premise was interesting, it was too dense. I think she could have effectively told the story without nearly 600 pages.

It's a world where witches, vampires and daemons exist in a tense truce while trying to keep under humanity's radar. Diana Bishop is a descendent from a long line of famous witches but she's determined to not use magic. Matthew Clairmont is an extremely old vampire who develops an interest in Diana after she discovers an old book that may have the secret of the origins of supernatural creatures. Other forces are out to get the book as well so Matthew takes it upon himself to protect Diana.

Lots of characters, history lessons and plot lines to follow. I'm somewhat interested in the next book but I don't feel compelled to read it. Diana and Matthew are actually the least interesting characters in the story. I wanted more with the supporting cast.

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Classic TV - WKRP - "Oh, the humanity!"

2011-11-24T09:16:00.001-07:00

A friend of mine posted this mashed up video of what was one of the funniest bits in TV history on Facebook yesterday and I had to repost it. As did several others. I also sent it out to my team at work for a little pre-Thanksgiving Day fun.

One of my co-workers and I went off on how much we loved this show. We both crushed on Andy. I admitted that I wanted to be as cool as Johnny Fever. What was amazing, considering it was on the air from 1978 to 1982, was how much I remembered of it.

I rattled off the characters' names like they were members of my own family. Andy Travis, Les Nesman, Herb Tarlek, Mr. Carlson, Mrs. Carlson, Bailey Quarters, Venus Flytrap and the aforementioned Johnny Fever. The only character's whose last name I couldn't come up with was Jennifer's. I even remembered Herb's wife, Bunny.

There are some TV shows that I watch now and that I've been watching for several years and I can't name all of the characters. Detective Ryan's first name on Castle? Can't recall. Seriously. I know the actor is Seamus Dever so I got that going for me.

Why is that? Is it because these shows were on when my brain was still young and capable of remembering better? Have I filled my head with so much useless trivia that there's not room for new stuff? Is there so much more in the world competing for my attention that I'm not able to store all the data?

I suspect it's a little of each of those theories but I believe the main reason is that TV was so much better in those days. MASH, All In The Family, Mary Tyler Moore, Taxi. All great shows that managed to be intelligent, funny, culturally relevant and thought provoking at the same time.

Not all shows were all that great, I admit. Remember Manimal? Or, even the original Battlestar Galactica?

I'm not trying to be the cranky oldster, "Back in the day..." There are some good shows on now. But, it's hard to find that same originality that we had back in the day. There, I said it.

Come on, how many versions of American Idol, NICS, CSI, Big Brother and Dancing With The Stars do we really need? I need none (except for competitive cooking shows but that's just a seriously crazy addiction of mine). However, I would love more shows like Arrested Development, Deadwood and the new Battlestar Galactica.

I guess I should find some comfort in that at least I have my memories, Netflix and a lot of potential DVD re-watching of the old "classics".

Book Review - Last Breath

2011-11-24T09:02:00.001-07:00

Last Breath by Rachel Caine
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I'd go 3 1/2 stars if I could.

Things are never good in the vampire run town of Morganville. This time, vamps start going missing, head vamp Amelie gets a disturbing message that sends her into a tailspin and one of the main characters dies. Action packed as usual and I did tear up a few times. What I like about this series is that Caine actually changes the environment so we can see progression in the overall storyline. (Hint, hint, Laurell K. Hamilton.)

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Midwest Potluck Of A Different Sort

2011-11-23T08:14:00.001-07:00

My Regional Communicator friends from the PHiP Midwest Region, Dawnie and Jim, decided to put together a regional party during MOTM week. Lots of clubs have events but I think this was the first sponsored by a region. It was advertised as a potluck because each of the entertainers brought just a little bit to share. Though, one guy didn't get it and asked Dawnie where the food was.

I don't know whose idea it originally was but Barb Herzog was the workhorse as she tried to schedule and manage the entertainment. Her husband Dave was also invaluable working the equipment and played with several of the entertainers, too. He's a great pan player.

Big Jim, Mary Ann, Barb and Dave Herzog, Jim and Dawnie

Oh, and there was sooooo much entertainment! The official party was from 7 PM to midnight on Wednesday night at Schooner Wharf Bar. Dawnie had to evict the last performer from the stage right at midnight, it was that full of an evening. Our gig was following up the CD release party for the band Homemade Wine.

Wow, Homemade Wine has a lot of fans. And, deservedly so. They were awesome! They had the place packed for their gig, played a slot in ours and also let us use their equipment for the event. Very cool.

Homemade Wine - Buy Their CD!

Barb gave everyone except Homemade Wine just a 15 minute slot to play. That was about time for 2 to 3 songs each. As we got closer to the show day, more and more entertainers were asking for a spot. It was so fun to see that they all wanted to play. And, it was convenient for them as Barb worked them in around their other gigs that night. Have I mentioned how much work Barb did to make this all happen? A lot.

At my count, we had 16 different acts for the night. My count is from my pictures as I was the official event photographer. I'm bummed that my camera doesn't do as well at night as I wanted to so some of the pics weren't that great but I did get everyone. Barb was nice enough to tag all of the musicians on Facebook the next day so I didn't have to.

Our very own star musician, Sam Rainwater played the party. He was joined on stage by another Arizona peep, Dan Creed. Dan rocks at the harmonica and can join in with anyone.

Dan "Chili" Creed and Sam "Rocket Man" Rainwater

The whole evening was great but I think the highlight for most of the crowd was when KD Moore showed up and brought along Greg "Fingers" Taylor and Amy Lee. Those are former members of Jimmy Buffett's band for those not in the know. They played with Mike Broward who really enjoyed the experience as well.

Fingers, Mike, KD and Amy - Awesomesauce!

Poor Jim Hoehn. He had to follow the former Coral Reefers. As always, he was fun and a good sport about it.

Seriously, I have to play after those guys?

The highlight for the night for my friend Norene was to pose with Fingers. He was just hanging around and she was fluttering around him when I asked her if she wanted a picture with him. "YES!" I don't know why she didn't ask herself but I think she was too starstruck. I wasn't. "Hey, Greg, would you mind posing for a picture?" "Not at all!"

We call her Wet Spot - Can you guess why?

I posted the picture on Facebook and was holding it ransom until she signed up but I don't think that will ever happen so I'm just going to email it to her.

What a great evening it was. People were talking about it the rest of the week and I imagine we'll have even more of a bash next year. Can't wait!

Pretty Sure It Was The Axe Murderer...

2011-11-22T20:09:00.001-07:00

...or maybe a raccoon because they scare me, too.

George and I were awakened at 1:30 this morning. At first, I couldn't figure out why. But, then I realized it was from someone tapping on my front security door. Or, scratching. I couldn't quite tell but they weren't actually knocking.

We both left the bedroom to investigate. I only made it to the kitchen where I tried to peek through the big window next to the door without being seen.

George bounded out into the dining room, growled then jumped into her kitty condo which is in front of the big window. She repeatedly looked out the window then looked back at me.

I actually said, "George, is it a human out there?" like she could tell me. I swear she was trying to tell me something and she's probably still disappointed that her Mommy is such a dunce that she couldn't figure the message out.

There was no more noise after she showed herself in the window. My fierce little hero. She scared them away!

We headed back to bed. Well, I went back to bed while she jumped on my suitcase that's still on the floor. It wasn't easy to go back to sleep. Between her kneading the suitcase and any peripheral noise, it took me forever to doze off again as I had so many thoughts buzzing through my head.

The most prominent thought was that I was going to find a dead body outside the door in the morning and the scratching noises were from that person desperately trying to get attention before expiring. Or, it could have been a vampire trying to get me to let it in. Although, I think it's more likely that it was the axe murderer trying to trick me into opening my front door in the dead of night.

Or, it could have been one of the neighborhood cats trying to say "hey" to George.

What's His Name VS The Coral Reefers

2011-11-22T16:50:00.001-07:00

There are still some Key West tales to tell...

One of my for sure "want to do" agenda items for MOTM was to see my pal Bob Karwin play at the host hotel, Casa Marina, on Saturday. Bob wasn't going to be on the island long and I knew that was one gig I could make so we made a point of being there.

We got a table just off the front side of the stage and settled in for the usual fun music, snarky stories about other performers and crowd heckling. Typical Karwin fare.

Of course, he did his classic rendition of Ring Of Fire. Some of our club members established the tradition of playing kazoos where the trumpets usually are. If you don't have a kazoo, you can fake it. Of course, Tracy the Overachiever actually had her kazoo.

Commence Kazoo Impressions

At one point, we could hear music coming from the main stage which is at the other end of the property. Karwin paused for a bit but then kept going. However, it got louder and he stopped again, stood on stage and stared. It was Jimmy Buffett's band, The Coral Reefers, doing their sound check for their show that night.

After waiting to see if it would get quieter again, Karwin said (and I'm paraphrasing because I don't remember the exact words but I think you'll get the sentiment), "I get the Casa bar stage and have to go up against the Coral Reefers. Thanks a lot. Eff it, I can outplay them."

And, he did.

He rocked it out and they faded into the background. It was a great, high energy show and I felt a little sorry for Jim Hoehn having to come up after him. Jim's such a laid back, groovy kind of guy and Karwin had everyone revved up. Jim was great as usual, though.

It was all quite fun and Karwin can truly state he outplayed The Coral Reefer Band.

Fantasy Football - Week 11

2011-11-22T15:46:00.001-07:00

I won in both my club and work leagues and my record in both is 6-5. Talk about consistent mediocrity. The good news is that I'm currently in 4th place in the work league and the top 6 make the playoffs. There's two weeks remaining in the regular season so I'm just hoping for wins so no one can move ahead of me.

Pick 'Em wasn't a horrible week but it wasn't great. I'm in 4th place in both leagues. Man, I wish I could get back up in the work game because that's where the money is. I mucked a pick two weeks ago and selected Indy by mistake and that margin is what's keeping me down. Bummer.

Oh, let's see who's injured. Between both teams: Adrian Peterson, Jay Cutler, Matt Schaub, Jahvid Best, Frank Gore, Fred Jackson, Greg Jennings and Deion Branch. That's not counting the guys I've already dropped for injuries. This has been a very unlucky year for me in that regard.

Two weeks of the regular season to go...

Separation Anxiety

2011-11-16T23:17:00.001-07:00

On the last day of our Meeting of the Minds trip in 2010, the Pirate Captain and I got into a little dustup. I said I missed my baby and couldn't wait to get home to see her. That sent him into a long speech about how she doesn't love me and only cares about her food and if her dish stayed full she wouldn't care if I was there or not.

Of course, he was very wrong.

Each time I come home from a trip, I walk around the corner to my front door and I can hear George crying on the inside. Seriously, it's the most pathetic meowing of all time. She doesn't do it when I come home from work, only when I've been gone overnight. And, for the record, her food dish is seldom empty.

Apparently, I've been gone too much of late because she was really affected by my last MOTM trip. Not only did she cry when I got home, she's been like white on rice with me since then.

I got home late Monday night last week and I wanted nothing more than to sleep. I gave her lovings and talked to her for a while but then I crashed. Not for long, though. I swear she woke me up every hour demanding to get under the covers to snuggle or to lie on top of me and purr. Of course, she requires me to pet her at the same time which I've learned to do in a semi-sleep state.

The demands for affection haven't stopped since then. Unless she's sleeping, she has to be by me or on me. Unfortunately for me, she doesn't sleep at night very much so as soon as I look like I'm half awake, she pounces. There's nothing like a cat licking your face to make sure you're completely awake at 2 AM.

The only thing that's saving me is that my two suitcases are still lying on the bedroom floor. She's adopted them as her cat beds so sometimes she misses my tossing and turning as she's doing her best to shed white hair over both of the suitcases. Seriously, the black one is now almost gray.

Fortunately, I think I'm homebound until the end of the year so I hope she calms down. Although, I must confess it's nice to know that someone misses me that much. She does love me, regardless of what the Pirate Captain says.

Fantasy Football - Weeks 9 and 10

2011-11-16T08:32:00.001-07:00

I've been too dang busy to post much and too frustrated with football to even care. Many of my starters in both leagues were on a bye in week 9 and it showed. I lost both games. I totally kicked butt in the club league this week but lost a much needed game against the first place team in the work league.

Adrian Peterson - how could you fail me? Damn Viking.

To add to my injury issues, Cam Newton is banged up so I was considering starting my back up QB, Matt Schaub. Yeah, he's probably out for the rest of the year. I can't believe the NFL wants to add more games to the season. The players are dropping like flies this year.

I've lost all skill at Pick 'Em and have dropped to 4th in the club game but am hanging on to 2nd in the work game.

Books - Cross Fire

2011-11-16T08:25:00.001-07:00

Cross Fire by James Patterson
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I clearly had lost steam on this series since I didn't know I missed a book until I saw that a new one was coming out.

Cross deals with a sniper taking out high profile baddies. Bad in that they're corrupt corporate officials, congressman, lobbyist, etc. While covering the case, the psychotic Kyle Craig makes his reappearance after breaking out of prison and threatens Cross and his entire family.

Without giving any spoilers, I was glad to see some movement forward on a few of the story lines.

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Brunch Fun

2011-11-10T17:59:00.001-07:00

There's a Club Leader's Brunch on Friday morning during Meeting of the Minds. PHiP (Parrot Heads in Paradise which is our national organization) sponsors it and there are presentations by the officers and several guest speakers from our various charities and sponsors. Each club is entitled to send two members. They don't have to be club officers but they often are. It's the best free meal on the island and a great chance to catch up with old friends from other clubs.

The event has changed over the years. When I first started attending, it was a free for all. Grab seats where you could find them and make some new friends. I actually liked that because it was a chance to meet people from the other side of the country. However, a few years ago, they decided to put all of the folks in the same region together.

I belong to the Western Region which covers Arizona - California - Colorado - Idaho - Hawaii - Montana - Nevada - New Mexico - Oregon - Utah - Washington Alberta - British Columbia - Saskatchewan. (Can you tell that was a cut and paste list?) Each region has two or three Regional Communicators (you didn't realize you were getting a Parrot Head organizational lesson, did you?) and it's those folks who are in charge of making sure the sections for their regions are staked out before the brunch starts. That's a heated battle sometimes as there always seems to be too few seats available.

Another change is that the RCs are encouraged to provide some "spirit" to the event and there's an unofficial Spirt Award. I say unofficial because I think someone just decides, "you guys won". So, we get there early and set up then provide some entertainment or gifts for our peeps.

This year, all of the attendees were given a colored ticket to make getting everyone in easier and the ticket color was coded to a region so it made it easier to get people together once they were in.

Our color was purple which is the color of royalty. So, I decided to provide some arts and crafts and bought a bunch of crown and tiara kits. It was fun to watch everyone (even the guys) indulge their creative sides.

Nice looking crowd!

Being the Princess, I didn't make my own tiara. I got Tkay to make it for me. It was truly because I was busy trying to greet everyone in our group but hey, it worked for me, too.

One of my other RCs bought plastic wristbands and key chains in purple with PHiP Western Region on them. That was a nice keepsake and we had some extras for the peeps to take back to their clubs.

However, we had no chance at the Spirit Award. My friends Dawnie and Jim have a lock on that. Last year, they got everyone to dress up as pirates for the brunch. This year, they took their color of grey and ran with it to excess. Everyone got a shark fin headband and a sign with different grey related facts. Oh, and they also got almost everyone to wear matching Midwest Region t-shirts.

Just can't compete with this...

It was all fun. One of the regions had a coconut bra decorating contest. Another gave out little gift cups full of goodies. And there was one who did just nothing but their people had a good time anyway.

Waiting For Jimmy*

2011-11-10T07:20:00.001-07:00

The big question at every Meeting of the Minds is whether Jimmy Buffett will show up. Rumors abound, numerous JB sightings are reported and everyone follows up their hellos to friends with "So, do you think he's coming?"

This year the questions were even more prevalent as it was the 20th convention. How could Jimmy not show? Well, we've asked that same question in years past and he didn't even when I had it on good authority that he was scheduled to appear.

We really didn't have much time to speculate this year because the official word was out on Wednesday morning. JB was going to play at the Street Festival on Friday with Mac McAnnaly at 4 PM.

Some of our gang has a brunch that we have to go to on Friday morning so we send a few peeps to mark out our space in front of the stage. We don't try to get to the very front but we do get a nice spot for viewing and it's usually not so crowded that you can't get out to use the washroom.

Not so uncrowded this year. Once you got out, you weren't coming back.

The Coral Reefers started setting up on stage and, sure enough, there was The Man as promised. He said they weren't going to play anything written after 1975 and I don't think they did until the encore of It's Five O'Clock Somewhere.

James Buffett and his Coral Reefers

What a great show! Everyone on stage was having a good time and they sounded sharp. The crowd was really in to it. There were reports of uncool behavior here and there but I think that was to be expected with the amount of people jammed in to a small area.

I found out just how jammed it was when I realized that I was going to need the washroom soon and waiting in line at the end of the show was going to be too late. So, I headed off to Jack Flats to use their washroom.

It was brutal getting through the line. I kept telling people that I was leaving and not coming back and most folks were willing to let me squeeze by. And, squeeze it was. I had some pins on my lanyard and they got sheared off as I went past someone. Fortunately, someone picked them up for me.

I finished watching the show in the less crowded back which was fine with me. It was just nice to know that the dude who inspired all of this madness and goodness came to play for his fans.

*Waiting For Jimmy is by my pal, Rob Mehl, and was voted Trop Rock Song Of The Year on Friday night. Way to go, Rob!

Book Review - Kitty's House of Horrors

2011-11-09T08:52:00.001-07:00

Kitty's House of Horrors by Carrie Vaughn
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Werewolf Kitty is talked into filming a supernatural reality show. Along with some other weres, a couple of vamps, a magician, some psychics and a skeptic, she's sent off to a secluded ranch for a Big Brother like experience. It all turns to hell as people start getting killed off. Stranded, the supes and teams have to fight their way to survival.

I like this series a lot. Kitty and friends are interesting and the individual stories are good while also containing enough for a continuing storyline.

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Book Review - Voices of Dragons

2011-11-09T08:46:00.001-07:00

Voices of Dragons by Carrie Vaughn
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

An alternative timeline story from the teen section of the library. The nukes of WWII awakened the sleeping dragons. Literally. The world is still recovering when a war between dragons and humans breaks out. A peace treaty is established with parts of the world becoming dragon territory and no crossing of the border is permitted. Years pass.

Kay is a 17 year old living in a town on the border of the dragon territory. She likes to flirt with danger and a mishap causes her to be on the wrong side of the border where she meets a young dragon. The two become friends and, when the human military hawks decide to provoke another war with the dragons, they do their best to stop it.

Vaughn does a good job of developing characters as well as stories. Kay and her friends are typical teenagers; worried about dating, pushing their limits with their parents and trying to get through the sometimes agonizing teenage years.

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Space Invader

2011-11-07T09:27:00.001-07:00

Flying is not the fun that it used to be. Planes are full, everyone and their brother tries to stuff too many carry ons in to too few bins and there are too many yahoos who apparently either don't know traveling etiquette or don't care.

I was lucky to have a direct flight from Phoenix to Miami on my way to Key West. I always book early so I can get the window seat. Mostly because I like to lean on it and sleep but also because I never get up and I don't want to have to get up to let other people go by me.

So, there I was, all tucked in to my seat with all my gear stowed when what appeared to be a whole multi-generational family filled in the two seats next to me, the two rows in front of me and another row on the other side of the aisle next to me. It looked like Grandma and her sister, parents and a bunch of teens and young adults. All Spanish speaking and I'm not sure any of them spoke English. I know the older ones near me didn't.

Dad and Mom sat in my row with Mom in the middle. I can only assume she's never been on a plane since Dad had to fasten her seatbelt and show her the button to adjust her seat back. He also felt compelled to order all of her beverages (while ignoring her requests). Why he felt compelled since he didn't speak English either is beyond me.

That was all just people watching to me and didn't really bother me. What did bother me was that Mom kept digging her elbow into my side. I know I'm big, but I was well contained within my seat and was even leaning further away so I could catch 40 winks.

Those winks were hard in coming because I would just nod off when, jab! Right into the side. It was worse when she had a drink in her hand because apparently she could only consume it with her arm completely akimbo.

Normally, I would have said, very nicely, "Excuse me, could you try to keep your elbow in, please? You're poking me in the side." Unfortunately, my long ago high school and college Spanish classes have been purged from my memory so I had no idea how to say anything remotely close.

So, I just lived with it. To reinforce my theory that they weren't frequent (if at all) flyers, our plane landed and, during the "Please keep you seat belts fastened until we get to the gate" speech, Dad reached over and unfastened Mom's belt then his own. And, we were barely stopped at the gate when half of the family jumped in to the aisles, grabbed their stuff and started pushing their ways forward.

I wasn't sorry to see them leave.

Book Review - Uglies

2011-11-07T09:11:00.002-07:00

Uglies by Scott Westerfeld
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Very intriguing idea. "Society" has decided that mankind's problems lay in our biological urges. We naturally gravitate to people who are physically ideal and treat those who aren't perfect poorly. The answer is to have everyone undergo a massive makeover at age 16. Before the surgery, teens are called Uglies. After, they're called Pretties and are seemingly nothing more than a huge group of beautiful revelers.

However, there's a group that rejects the idea of Pretties and refuse the surgery. The main character, Tally, falls in with this group despite desperately wanting to be Pretty and this first book in the series provides not only a good story but a nice background for the future books.

We decided to read this for our book club but have now decided to read the trilogy then discuss. That's a clear indicator that people are liking it.

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Did You Miss Me?

2011-11-07T08:52:00.001-07:00

Sometimes, I don't post very often because life gets too busy or I get too lazy. This past week, I didn't post because I was in Key West and I didn't want to write about that in case someone decided to come rob my house while I was gone. I don't care so much about my stuff but I do care about someone letting my cat out. My baby doesn't go outside.

I could have set up some post-dated posts but I was so swamped before I left, I was lucky to get packed and to the airport in time. My life has been hectic, to say the least. And, I'm not really looking forward to coming home to it.

What a week it was, though! This was the 20th Meeting of the Minds event. That's the annual Parrot Head convention for those not in the know. And, for those really out of the loop, that's a group that formed up around Jimmy Buffett. If you don't know who Jimmy Buffett is, then I refuse to help you anymore. Wikipedia or getting out of the cave you live in might help.

Coming up over the next few days will be plenty of stories and pictures from my week with 3,500 of my closest parrot head friends. I hope you enjoy.

Fantasy Football - Week 8

2011-10-31T07:39:00.002-07:00

Yeah, I know there's still a game tonight. But, unless Ryan Mathews scores 67 points, my games are in the books.

What a squeaker in the club game! I thought I was in good shape going into last night's game but Tony Romo's and the Cowboys' suckitude almost cost me the game. I ended by winning by 84 to 76. It wouldn't have been so close if I'd submitted a different lineup. All of my bench players, except the ones on byes, outscored my starters in the same positions. Any time that happens and you can still pull out a win, you have to be happy.

That makes my record go to 4-4 which isn't bad. We are almost all trending around .500.

I dominated my opponent in the work league. He had only one choice on his starters as I hit him on a big bye week for his team. The score is currently 133 to 66.04 and he has the aforementioned Mathews going tonight. I'm feeling pretty secure.

My record will be 5-3 which, if my initial ganderings are correct, will put me in sole position of second place and one game behind the leader. Sweet! Especially, considering my 0-3 start to the season.

I don't even want to talk about frakking Pick 'Em.

The Good Life

2011-10-30T20:22:00.002-07:00

If I were to believe in reincarnation, I would want to come back as a house cat. What a life. Someone feeds you, shelters you, buys you toys and loves you even when you're a demon. Well, that's the ideal house cat life anyway.

As I was running around this morning trying to get a lot of things done in a short period of time, I looked in my living room and this is what I saw:

Tell me it doesn't get better than this; enjoying a sun ray and guarding your oldest "baby". Add in knowing that your food and water dishes were full and it's a good life, indeed.

Book Review - Plugged

2011-10-30T08:54:00.001-07:00

Plugged by Eoin Colfer
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This was definitely a book I could happily have read in one sitting. Unfortunately, I didn't give myself time enough and I think I lost a little momentum/connection while finishing it up.

Daniel McEvoy is an ex-pat Irishman working as a doorman in New Jersey for a trashy casino/strip club. The disappearance of his only friend and the murder of one of his co-workers sets him on a path of violent, cunning and funny (yes, funny) investigation. It doesn't help that he suffers from PTSD from his time in Lebanon as a peace keeper.

I've read lots of Colfer's Young Adult work and really appreciated how he didn't dummy it down because it was for kids. This is definitely an adult book with very mature content but Colfer brought the same wit and reader engagement that he did to his YA work.

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Book Review - The Cuckoo's Egg

2011-10-29T12:14:00.001-07:00

The Cuckoo's Egg: Tracking a Spy Through the Maze of Computer Espionage by Clifford Stoll
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Great true story about computer hacking. Cliff Stoll was a reluctant systems administrator at Berkley in 1986. All university computer time was charged out to various entities and a 75 cent discrepancy is found. Tracking that down led to a year long investigation into a hacker that involved the military, NSA, NASA, CIA, FBI and other government agencies from the US and around the world.

Stoll does a nice job of explaining the computer jargon, though a non-techie might find it a little dry. He also adds a personal touch as he talks about the effect of his search on his home life and philosophical beliefs. You really get his frustration at the actions of the invader and the inactions of all of the agencies that should have reacted and supported his efforts sooner in the timeline.

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I Could Have Used a Little Less Help, Actually

2011-10-28T17:01:00.000-07:00

I pulled some laundry out of the dryer this morning so I could hang it up. An interim stop was to put it on top of my bed while I got the hangars.

George decided she wanted to "help" me. And, by help, I mean she first made sure she was at least partially lying on each item. Then, she attacked each hangar as I was attempting to put the clothes on them. Finally, she resorted to extended her claws so she could hook on to the clothes and retain them.

I managed to get them hung up and left the tee-shirt I was planning to wear today on the bed as I hit the shower. She had her claws in to it. I fully expected to see her still guarding it when I got out of the shower but she must have gotten bored and left to wreak her evil havoc elsewhere in the house.

It's mine, dammit, all mine!

2011-10-27T22:07:00.001-07:00

When I was home sick last week, I heard lots of noise outside while I was trying to sleep. It didn't actually stop me from sleeping, though. When I finally emerged from my cold coma, this is what I saw. There used to be a huge row of bushes. Now, there's just scrubs.

To give you some perspective, I park back by the dumpster and my front door is in the left corner of this picture.

I have no idea what compelled the maintenance crew to eviscerate those poor bushes.

But, I'm kind of happy they're gone.

See, I was always worried that the axe murderer (or a vampire) could hide in those bushes and jump out to attack me as I walked from my car to my door. Seriously, there was room for both to hide at the same time.

But, now that they're gone, I miss the bushes. It looks really barren out there. Having an anxiety free walk doesn't make up for that.

RIP, scary bushes. I hope you come back to life.

Bacon Works With Everything

2011-10-27T21:39:00.000-07:00

I've gotten a little backed up with my organic fruits and veggies. I had three butternut squashes and one acorn squash waiting to be eaten so I decided I better cook one of the butternuts tonight.

Usually, I just throw some butter and Italian spices in then bake squash. However, this time I decided to chop up some bacon and cook it in the squash in the oven. I then cracked a little pepper over it and added a dash of salt before eating.

Dee-licious!

The bacon added some really nice moisture to the squash as well as that great bacon flavor. However, the squash flavor held up, too, so it was just a nice dish. And, ultimately, a pretty low calorie dish, too. Bacon is surprisingly low-cal in only 50 calories a slice.

Rain in Phoenix = Traffic Nightmare

2011-10-26T22:41:00.000-07:00

You'd really think that since we have so many out of state transplants, they would actually be OK with driving when there's a little bit of moisture on the roads. However, you would be terribly wrong.

When I left work last night it was to find a surprising rain shower happening. Surprising, because when I left the building for a meeting only a few hours earlier, there was no indication of rain. Even more surprising was that it was a pretty steady downpour. Usually, our early evening rains are more like spits than pours.

Because I was meeting The Rocket Scientist for dinner, I was on a time table so I was little less patient than I would normally be on my drive home. I actually have no idea how many times I loudly asked, "Really?" The thing is that we were stopping (yep, complete stops on the freeway) for no apparent reason so many times that the 202 was backed up before Scottsdale Road to the 101 and I barely got over to the exit lane before I hit my exit at McClintock (one mile for those not familiar). It was just plain crazy.

Of course, there had to be that jackass in a Corvette who decided that this stopping and slowing was nothing he needed to worry about. I honestly thought he was going to rear-end the car in front of him that was going 25 when he came upon it going 60. Watching that was extra stress that I didn't need.

I can usually get to the restaurant from my work in 20 minutes. I took me 35 because of the rain delayed traffic.

People, people, people. Sure the roads are slick and that water falling from the sky is unfamiliar but you can still have a reasonable flow of traffic. It doesn't have to be the usual 65-70 MPH but it's not unreasonable to ask for at least 55. Especially when the limit is 65.

I just think anyone who's worried about the rain should stick to the surface streets. It probably would have eliminated 80% of the cars on the freeway. That would have made for a really sweet drive instead of one where I couldn't wait to hit my first glass of wine just to relax.

Chopped Guidelines

2011-10-26T20:07:00.001-07:00

After watching countless hours of Chopped, I've come up with some strategies that the contestants should follow.

Make ice cream if you get the chance. The judges get so excited at just the attempt. Even if it doesn't turn out perfectly, you get credit for trying.
Don't use red onion. I don't know why they don't like it but they don't. Maybe they think it's too strong or too common?
Use red bell pepper in very small doses. Just like the red onion, they don't seem pleased by this ingredient.
Don't be the arrogant asshole. In most, but not all, episodes there are chefs with huge egos who are convinced their cooking is far superior to their lesser skilled contestants. They trash talk the other chefs directly and behind the scenes and just seem like people you would never want to hang out with. I've never seen one of the arrogant assholes win the $10,000 first prize so clearly it's not a winning strategy.

Actually, number four could be a great guideline for life. Don't be an arrogant asshole and you increase your chances of winning whatever contest you're in.

Story Of My Life!

2011-10-25T07:44:00.004-07:00

Fantasy Football Week Seven

2011-10-24T22:50:00.001-07:00

First of all, this isn't a fantasy. My Packers are 7-0, baby! Woot!

I got my ass handed to me in the club league so I'm down to 3-4. However, I won in the work league and that makes me 4-3 with 4 wins in a row. Both games were scary because I had a lot of bye players and injuries to deal with. I should have taken Aaron Rodgers with my first pick in the work league. He's been a complete stud.

Pick 'Em was just ridiculous. I sucked. I finally could no longer ride the wave of my first few good weeks of picks and I'm now in second place behind the Jello Shot Prince in our club league by 6 points but still somehow still in first place in the work league by only 4 points.

Correction - I'm actually in third place in the club league as The Rocket Scientist so helpfully pointed out. It wasn't fully updated for the Monday night game when I looked at it.

What Is This Situation?

2011-10-24T21:01:00.000-07:00

I don't have Parrot Head duties, my DVR is empty, my house is clean (as it will ever get), laundry and dishes are done and I got home from work before 7. Is this opening in my schedule that thing they call "free time"? (Whomever "they" are.)

I thought free time was a myth. Like unicorns and rational Republican Presidential candidates. But, it's apparently real and I'm experiencing it.

It does seem somewhat familiar like perhaps something from my distant past. Very distant past. I'm going to enjoy it because it just can't last. I still have a lot of work hours ahead of me before vacation and then vacation (which includes no free time at all) and then lots of work hours to make up for my vacation.

But, in the meantime, I'm going to enjoy a glass of wine, read a book and relax.