Sticking It To The Man (And Our Waistlines)

We got a corporate email today that said they're putting healthier snacks in the vending machines and removing soda altogether.

Here's the deal on the machines. They've already gone "healthier" which means there's a bunch of dry and rock like granola bars, no chocolate and an unappealing selection of low-fat food. Pretty much what no one wants to eat.

Because they've gone to low-fat, there's a bunch of stuff with lots of sugar and high fructose corn syrup which is not good for you. I actually complained about it a while ago (Pop-Tarts are not healthy) and was asked to help find better selections. I must confess, I didn't because I keep a candy jar at my desk and really didn't care. I just wanted to make the point that low-fat doesn't always equate to good for you.

However, the fact that the machines' contents were going even "healthier" triggered an animated conversation within our team about how employees are grown-ups and if they want a treat, it's silly to stop them. I know the move is an attempt to make us healthier but, seriously, when you crave a Hershey's bar, you want a damn Hershey's bar and nothing else.

And, here's the thing. There's a black market of sorts on "good" candy. If you know where to go, you can get something and the money is actually going to charity. Win-win.

We all started joking about how we should expand the black market. It was suggested I put a tip jar next to my candy jar. The jar is currently empty because I forgot to buy anything during my last grocery store trip but, when it has content, the CFO is often visiting. He's got big bucks so tipping should be easy for him. ;-)

The conversation also triggered a desire to have chocolate. Right at that moment. One of our guys who's really not a candy guy at all hit the downstairs source for a set of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. I, with assistance from someone who knows where the stash is, got a bag of plain M&Ms.

Those were the best M&Ms of my life! Forbidden M&Ms are so much better. We were almost giddy with the thought of getting away with eating something forbidden.

I know they're trying to make us healthier by reducing our temptations but the reality is people want to have a Snickers or a Coke. Maybe not every day but every once in a while. I've read enough studies that say trying to satisfy that urge with something else doesn't work. You'll eat that item then eventually give in to your craving later.

My opinion (which is not that of the company or management or whatever disclaimer I have to make to cover my ass) is that if you allow people to be grown ups they will act accordingly. But, as soon as you make something scarce or scandalous, you're going to make people want it even more.