I Blame Hollywood, I Blame The Movie Studios, I Blame Peter Jackson, I Blame The People Paying To See These Movies

Man, do I have a bone to pick with a lot of people!

One of the movie options on my overseas flights was The Hobbit:  The Desolation of Smaug. I hadn't seen the first entry in the trilogy so I passed on the second but considered I might want to watch it next time. So, out of curiosity, I watched The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey on HBO On Demand.

It should be called The Hobbit: An Unnecessarily Long and Aggravating Reimagining Of A Classic Story That You Loved.

Yeah, that's a long title. But, fitting for how ridiculously long the movie was. To call it bloated is kind. It was beyond overstuffed!

Sugar Daddy and I were discussing the initial movie and the first thing that got to him was the Dwarves singing as they put away the dishes. I told him I thought it was in the book but it's been so long since I read it, I wasn't 100% sure. That made me think about a lot of other things in the movie that I don't recall from the book so I did some research.

And, by research, I mean I reread the entire book.

I did have to tell Sugar Daddy that not only did they sing with the dishes, they sang even more that night in Bilbo's house. His reply was, "Yeah, but did they sing for 45 minutes like it was in the movie?" No, it was just a few stanzas. I had to agree with him, though, it felt really, really long.

I'm all for a little poetic license to make a film version of a book more understandable or even a better story.

I'm NOT for adding a gazillion characters and extended scenes so that you can take a 300 page paperback and make it into three movies that are each so long that your body is crying for a biobreak during them.

Oh, and making Bilbo into some sort of action hero by defending Thorin in a scene that "sorta" came from the book? Don't get me started on that or I'll go off for another fifteen paragraphs.

These guys - in the book.
I'm cool with them.
This guy - not in the book and completely unnecessary to the story.
So not in the book. Seriously, Legolas?
I can only imagine his addition was to appease Orland Bloom's fan girls.
Galadriel? Oh, come on now!
And, apparently in a love story with Gandalf!?!?!? 
I don't know how much money someone would have to pay me to watch the next two movies. I know I'm not paying a dime to see them. Not even continuing to see Richard Armitage and knowing that Benedict Cumberbatch is in there will entice me to allow myself to get angered at the spectacle.

Call me a curmudgeon if you will but overwhelming the audience with CGI and extraneous plot and characters does not entertainment make.


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