Even Butterflies Have To Land Sometime
For years on end, my social calendar has been full. Really full. Because I love doing things and being with my friends, I wouldn't turn down invitations. And, because I'm an extravert, if I saw too many blank days in a row, I'd seek out activities on my own. There was a very real level of anxiety if my schedule wasn't jam packed.
I was also a total PITA to make plans with. People learned that they had to get my time way in advance. They also assumed I was always busy so they often didn't think to ask if I could join them for last minute plans.
A few months ago, I slowed down enough to take a look at what I was doing. Being busy all the time was great until there was a schedule disruption. A couple unexpected long days at work or getting sick and I was suddenly behind on things like laundry and cleaning and club work and everything else I needed/wanted to do. My DVR filled up and I had overdue but unread library books. Oh, and sleep. I really didn't get any sleep.
I had a new type of anxiety. The anxiety of not being able to do it all.
So, I made a decision to throttle back. If I wasn't really jazzed about something, I said no. I also told myself to ignore those empty days on the schedule. I still didn't clean my house but I read a lot and actually got my DVR cleared.
I learned to relish my time alone and I found a great benefit - I had time for spontaneity.
A while back, I was headed to the library on a Saturday afternoon and decided wings sounded appealing. I called up Steven and the O'Malley Babes and we ended up on Zipp's patio for a lovely couple of hours eating bad for us food and drinking beers. It was great.
Yesterday afternoon at work, I decided that I needed some friendly comfort after two not great mornings this week. Fortunately, Crash, Tammy and Goat were able to meet me at our local pizza place. It was a great evening.
I've got nothing on the books for this weekend so I can charge up for next week where I have plans 5 nights out of 7. What used to be my norm is now the exception and I feel good about it.
Damn, I hope this doesn't mean I'm getting old.