Things I Learned In Key West

With a lot of hard work and positive attitudes, it is possible to move a 3,500 person convention to a new location in less than a week.

 

It can take 11 hours to drive 100 miles down the Keys.

 

You can get somewhere on foot in about the same time as it takes on a scooter.

 

You don't want to try to catch a flashlight when the power's out and you're standing on stairs by a window.

 

You don't want to be in a hot tub on the other side of a window on the stairs when the power's out and someone's trying to catch a flashlight.

 

Nicknames can't be forced but they can stick forever from one incident.  Such may be the case for Drunk Girl.

 

It takes less than 5 minutes to clear Sloppy Joe's during a bomb threat and more than an hour to sweep the building and reopen it.

 

Hog's Breath will continue to serve beer even with the power off.

 

You can tell people over and over that they need a photo ID to register and they'll still act flabbergasted and pissed off when you tell them they can't get their stuff without ID.

 

You can get 2 large takeout pizzas in less time than it takes to drink or get a beer.

 

There are actually some really bad performers in Key West.

 

Three Cuban sandwiches from The Reach in one week is not too many.

 

You only get one chance a day to catch sunset.

 

Carrying Advil on your person is a really good idea.

 

It takes a lot less time to get ready in the morning when you skip makeup and wear a ball cap.

 

It is possible that a drunken cowboy hat purchase will still look like a good deal the next morning.

 

Despite your best efforts, it's nearly impossible to meet more than 100 new people in a week.

 

It's good to find yourself sitting next to the Cruzan Rum Rep at the bar but you may end up being Drunk Girl Number Two if you do.

 

You can gain 5 pounds in 10 days despite eating only 2 meals a day and walking across the Key a couple of times each day.