My Proper Crusade


My aversion to the discussion and display of bodily functions is well known. Burping, farting, peeing and pooping are all things that should be done discreetly and never discussed. I don’t even like to say or hear the words. Ick.

The exception is when you warn people to stay out of the Goat Gas Zone but that’s it.

On my first trip to Calgary, I noticed that the public signs say Washroom instead of Bathroom or Restroom. (Don’t get me started on the horrid signs that say Toilet. That’s a picture you don’t want in your head.)

It’s not like you actually take a bath while you’re using public facilities. Nor, should you be resting. In, do your business, wash your hands then get out. That’s the ticket.

The key is washing so Washroom is perfectly named. Regardless of what you do in there, you should always wash afterwards.

I’ve gone on a personal crusade to get everyone to say Washroom. I figure if I start with my friends who are spread about the country, they can then influence their friends and so on and so on and our grassroots efforts will blossom.

I really hit up my peeps while we were in Florida. It only took a few times of them saying, “I’m going to the restroom” and for me to say “You mean washroom” before they started saying it themselves. Even if they started out with the wrong word then stumbled through the new and improved one.

I hope they’re keeping up with the new habit. I have and to the point where I asked someone in a dream last night where their washroom was. Seriously.

Just think, if we can get this to sweep the world, can world peace be far behind?

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